Thomas wrote...

>If you dont allow a child to enjoy
>and share
>foods that other children are eating (not all of the time but some of
>the time) you will create a social gulf between the child and others
>his age.  That is not healthy.>

I agree that balance and harmony with others is critical in trying to
maintain a "Holistic" life.
Being happy, and feeling loved and accepted is most important.

Hard in this society to eat well and not be considered a "nutcase".
Sometimes you need to compromise a bit- make your choices and suffer the
consequences.

Kids are surrounded by crap and candy at every turn. It is given as a treat
or reward in schools, churches and by well-intentioned friends and
relatives. It is everywhere.

When children are very young, you can to a much greater degree control what
they eat because they rely on you to provide food for them. As they get
older and more into the world at large, it is impossible (and ridiculous to
try) to micro-manage their food (or non-food) intake.

I have found with my kids, the best technique is to educate them, as best I
can, and let them make their own decisions. My kids volunteered just
recently to go sugar-free for a week as an experiment. They did pretty
well, but after that, they both decided on a course of moderation.

I try to feed them big healthy meals before going off to a party, or
sending something healthy with them to munch on. Mostly, I just prepare
them as much as possible and don't lay guilt trips on them when they make
mistakes. They do need the social interaction and acceptance and generally
handle it quite well. They report proudly, "Well, I did have a piece of
cake, but I ate some food first..."

If I forbid them to eat something, they would eventually sneak it, or
openly rebel. They do, however, know clearly where I stand on the food
front. Because I respect their opinions and decisions, they respect mine
(for the most part).  It is very hard to watch them struggle with their
choices, but that is the way they learn to make good decisions in life. I
can't hover over them all their life and I certainly don't want to be the
"Food Cop".

They are always asking me what I think of a certain food or if something is
good for them. I try to teach them to listen to their bodies and ask them
to see how they feel after they eat something. Sometimes they spontaneously
report "I ate too much sweet stuff. I feel awful."
They do get the connection.

My son (8) is hypoglycemic, like me, and he is quite aware his food choices
affect his well being. He will often announce "I need protein!"  My
daughter cares more about having clear healthy skin and hair, and my son
wants to be strong, feel good and run fast. So they ask me, and I give them
the best advice I can, and the reasons why I think so.

We are a work in progress, but I think as they become more aware of how
their choices affect them, they will make better and better decisions. Its
called growing up.

Louise