Asdis,

I think the problem you've touched on is not specific to women, or to
any race.  From when I was 16 (when I had my first real date) to when I
was 35 (when I got married), there were very few women who were willing
to look beyond my disability, and move any potential or actual
relationship beyond "the 'friend' zone."  My wife and I have been
married for 6 years now, and we both work in the disabilities field,
which is how we got together.  

It may help that we also both have cp, but as we get older, I think on a
practical basis, that may make things more difficult.  Gary's thought
about finding someone who is open and honest applies to everyone,
because we all have things that a potential partner will find as less
than attractive after he or she gets to know you.  My feeling is that
anyone who's not willing to be with someone as a friend or romantic
partner strictly because they have a disability is not worth my time
anyway.  Basically, it might be helpful to be "up front" about your
disability as a kind of "litmus test," and then move from there if
things look good.  Looking at the amount of time it took Janet and I to
get together, I'd say it was well worth the wait.  As I heard once, you
"have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince."

Kendall 
[log in to unmask]


-----Original Message-----
From: Gary Norris Gray [mailto:[log in to unmask]] 
Sent: Wednesday, January 21, 2004 10:58 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: Hi girls, can you give me some advice regarding men?!

hi ,

yes i can understand this problem as a disabled black man you have to
find a person that is open and honest .. one that can acceppt you for
what and who you are,, being african american its very difficult to find
black woman that will date disabled men ,,


just be open yourself to other disabled men that is another ave. of
dating

try different cultures just be open to all things.

dont waste time on negative people as soon as they come dismiss then
right away life is just too short for them to bring you down

go out and be seen ,, go out and be heard

good luck

Hi, I=B4m =C1sd=EDs from Iceland. As some of you may know, I=B4ve been=
seperated=20
for a long time and I haven=B4t had much luck with finding a man on
the=20
Internet or in daily life. My friends have told me that I should just
be=20
myself, I have tried that but when I mention my disability, men
disappear=20
quick. I don=B4t know what to do, can you give me any advice? I just
can=B4t=
=20
accept the thought of being alone for the rest of my life, without a=20
partner. How is it possible to fulfill those needs that people
generally=20
take for granted? I hope that you can give me some magic tip to help
me=20
with this problem.
Thank you,
=C1sd=EDs Jenna=20



gary norris gray


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