Hi Joanne,

        Betty is probably making a good move for herself - a few years ago I
had to drop most of my stuff becasue so much "bad"had  stuff had happened -
I was simple becoming more and more angry, sarcastic, combative and lashing
out at anything and everything, I was practically at the point where even I
didn't like myself, must have tried everyone else's patince also. Sometimes
just like naughty children - we need time out. It takes a longtime to
assimilate a bad experience - when you have multiple ones happening - I
think one day - its just too much, and its a good time to take time out - I
spent a year reading ( when I wasn't working or caring for Amber)- I racked
up 368 books in a year. I also regained my equilibrium becasue everyday I
wasn't bombarded with more bad stuff to deal with or having to deal with
others people bad stuff. I think we burn out on bad stuff, and if are not
careful - we will become really bitter, angry people who drive other nuts
and away. It gives one a chance to get away from just reacting and having
time to reflect. There was day I thought - Boy was I obnoxious upon
ocassion. And that heralded getting better and looking at what was really
wrong. I needed time - that in 8 years - I had been laid-off, gotten
divorce, lost my home, battled with cancer, become more disabled, bought a
house, broke up with my abusive boyfriend, got new job, got laid from my
part-time job, got new part-time job, had my beloved father-in-law accused
of molesting the grandchildren, lost another another boyfriend - one I had
hoped to marry, had several friends die and had one of my best friends ditch
me - along with maintaining working 3 jobs and taking care of Amber. That
was the straw that broke the camels back. Enough is enough. So I dropped off
the planet for awhile( as much as I could). It did me a world of good. Maybe
that the point to at which Betty has arrived.

                            Brightest Blessings - Trisha

> You have been through a great deal over the past
> several years. The loss of your mom, the loss of your
> body and the way you once you knew it to be,the loss
> of independence, and even at one time(and it may come
> up again in the future) the  thought of selling the
> family home, indeed another loss to be dealt with. The
> world must feel like it's spinning totally out of any
> control you may have been used to having. I think it
> would be very natural to be very bitter and angry
> being in this place in your life. I don't  believe a
> strong opinion ever bothered anyone on this list as
> long as it was done so not to attack any individual. I
> can say without a doubt you have always been kind to
> all members on this list and respectful of their
> opinions. I'm not sure taking a vacation would be
> healthy either as it is one of the few places I've
> ever seen( maybe the only one) where one can rant and
> rave, no matter how ugly you may think the opinion you
> are giving or how much you feel you are ramming it
> down someone's throat, the  list members will still
> send a warm fuzzy and hug because they read the
> struggle and hurt behind the words. You may need
> someone more professional than the list can offer but
> know that many on the list care about you and only
> wish the  best for you.
> LOts of warm fuzzies and hugs to get you through these
> hard times
> Joanne
>
>
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