Betty,
                A strong, warm hug to you!
Mariana Ruybalid

At 09:32 PM 6/17/00 , you wrote:
>Hi all,
>
>This is just a little note to share about the current state of my Mom's
>situation.  For those of you who are new to the list, my Mom has metastatic
>lung cancer.
>
>Mom's physical condition has declined rapidly, and she was admitted into the
>Hospice Center of Northern Virginia last Sunday.  She is resting as
>comfortably as possible, and doesn't appear to have much pain thanks to
>successful medication combinations.  She is quite weak however, suffers from
>extreme bouts of nausea, and is sometimes unable to talk simply due to the
>effect of medication.  The conversations I have had with Hospice staff lead
>me to believe that they don't think she will live long.  She has told me
>several times that she is ready to die, and asked me to pray for that to
>happen soon.
>
>I am delighted with the level of care and kind attention she is receiving
>from the Hospice staff.  Prior to her admittance into Hospice -- to be honest
>-- I had begun to wonder whether anything would happen in the course of her
>medical treatment that would impress me.
>
>Perhaps it seems that I should be distraught and grief stricken about my
>mother's impending death, but I am not.  She has enjoyed a full and rich
>life, and seized valuable opportunities to pursue her beloved career in
>library science.  She has faithfully attended to her civic responsibilities,
>and has never swayed from speaking the truth as she saw it, for the benefit
>of convenience.
>
>There are too many people who have not had these opportunities, for one
>reason or another.  There are too many voices that call from the darkness,
>yet are not heard.  With that in mind, I can think of nothing about my
>Mother's impending death that makes me sad, save for the illness from which I
>wish she could have been spared, and the fact that I will miss her dearly.
>Nevertheless, I will always have fond memories of my Mother's love.
>
>In many respects, I am lucky to have known her at all.  I feel the same way
>about my Father, so I don't feel grief at this time, only the fortune of
>having been blessed with good parents.  I am aware that many people do not
>know this particular comfort.
>
>My grief is for them.  I wish I could share with them what I have had.
>
>Having attended to the business affairs of final arrangements, I can sit back
>now, and enjoy the time I have left with my Mom.  Everything seems in order.
>I have decided not to attend her funeral.  I have spoken with her minister.
>He is a wonderful man, and understands my reasons.  My own minister will do
>something private with me.  I prefer to celebrate my Mother's life rather
>than mourn her passing.
>
>I mourn for those who never had the chance to live.
>
>Thank you, my friends, for being my friends.
>
>Betty
>