In a message dated 9/29/2002 7:30:28 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:


>
> Ralph Dahling,  You SIMPLY MUST come to Vermont and visit. (I think that's
> how you city folk talk.)  Well, I still want to.  Especially if you'll sell
> me all your broken $7 screwdrivers for $6.99.
> Ayup.  That's how we'uns talk in Joisey, alrighty.
>
> I thought so, that's the way they talk in the movies.
> We just saw "Goodfellas" again on video, and were surprised to see two of
> our "friends" from The Sopranos in it.  I won't tell you who.
>
> I consider myself lucky to have figured out what PEOPLE do and (more or
> less) how they do it; at least I think I've figured it out. I assumed
> mammals all work about the same (but then, I thought that cats were the
> female version of dogs, so there appear to have been some inadequacies in
> both my formal and informal education).
>
> Ralph, we must be related. For your sake, I'm sorry to hear that.  I
> thought you midwest farmers' daughters knew all about this stuff. When I
> was a kid we had LOTS of cats but no dogs.  I waited in vain for them to
> grow up to be dogs. Ruth, honey, I may have been dumb enough to think cats
> were F and dogs were M, but it never occurred even to me that the cats were
> gonna grow up into dogs.  I'll give you $6.95 each for your broken
> screwdrivers.
>
> But as far as birds and reptiles and bugs, let's just say I never went
> there.
>
> I thought you well educated city folk would have studied biology and
> learned all that stuff.
> Nope, not me.  Just physics-- why else would I think a penis is like a
> thumb?  (Except that the're both useful for holding hammers, and you can't
> pick your nose with either one).
>
>
> Ralph
>
> PS-- If ya think I'M bad, I had to point out to our female Rabbi that
> there's a problem with a line in our prayerbook that talks about "the
> calving of our oxen."
>
> If it is referring to the oxen having calves there is a problem. As I read
> the passage, it was the oxen having calves, and Rabbi Amy also seemed to
> read it that way. But then again, consider how little either of us seems to
> understand. Or is it referring to when the oxen were born or calved?
> However, I think back in the time the prayer book was originally written ox
> referred to any bovine that was used for work. That's the problem with our
> prayerbook-- it's (theoretically) based on the Bible and various related
> works as originally written in Hebrew or Aramaic, or God knows what, and
> periodically gets retranslated into English to make it all relevant or
> gender-neutral, or whatever the current fad is, AND it has to be different
> from the previous editions and the translations used in the prayerbooks of
> the other branches of Judaism.  So you can see where there "might" be a
> little room for well-intentioned foolishness such as "calving of oxen." Not
> just castrated males as we use the term today.  Whether the original Hebrew
> referred to draft animals or specifically to oxen,  God  (and those more
> learned than I) only knows. .But you better defer to the Rabbi No way in
> hell. on this as I have absolutely no knowledge
> of Jewish prayer books, but I have heard they are written upside down
> BZZZT. Right to left; Japanese (I think) is written verticallyor
> something.  Maybe that's why it takes so long to read them.  I have only
> ever been to one Jewish religous service, a Bar Mizpah for one of John's
> friends.  John wanted to go so I took him.  It was 3 HOURS LONG. You can
> bet the Jews resented every minute of it, too. I thought
> it would never end and I was sitting next to another of the friends who was
> there without parents and the kid is ADHD. You are a saint, but we already
> knew that.  He wiggled and squirmed the
> entire time with me telling him it would surely be over soon. Another adult
> lying to him! It was longer than a Catholic funeral.  So that's my whole
> experience with the Jewish faith Lucky for you. but I'm sure there must be
> more to it than that.  God, yes.  Hours and hours more. Let me know what
> you find out about the "calving oxen."   Ruth
> One of the guys in Arch school got married just before the end of our 5
years there, and invited us all, including some of our teachers top the
wedding.  Turned out this guy (in addition to being 7' tall) was a 7th Day
Adventist, which none of the rest of knew anything about.  Well,  they don't
believe in dancing or drinking or any of the kind of activities that
college-age people seem to enjoy, so we all sat there and ate our cookies and
drank our Hawaiian Punch and went home.  The next day in Structures class,
our Iran-born teacher came in and said that he had been to Persian funerals
that were more fun than this wedding.  Our friend the groom wound up getting
divorced and now designs humongous stadiums for some big midwestern arch
firm.   But as long as he doesn't enjoy it, I suppose it's OK.

Ralph