Phil,

Reading your account of blaming others reminded me of a commercial I saw on
TV a while back. It was a spoof  commercial  showing a TV Sportscaster
interviewing a football player with an attitude.  For the sake of  the
conversation we'll call the player Reggie and the sportscaster Brit.

Brit: Reggie, it looked like you guys had the game  going for you, then you
fumbled the ball and the other team recovered, running it in for the
winning touchdown.  Do you think your mistake had anything to do with your
team losing the game?

Reggie: Well Brit. As any good responsible player does, I first have to
look at   any mistakes I might have made, that is only right. But now you
and I both know I made none.  Now I believe it was the center's fault the
way he passed the ball to the quarterback, well actually I think it was the
quarterback's fault because he made a bad hand-off to me with all the noise
of the fans, well in fact Brit, I think it was the fans fault for being too
noisy. IN fact Brit for all I know it could have been your fault.


Gretchen knows where the truth lies in her problem, she knows it is not
you, her soon to be ex-husband, her mom, her kids, her parole officer, her
kindergarten teacher, or the waitress who gave her tea instead of coffee at
that restaurant last month. She knows deep inside where it lies and is
wading neck high in de-nile.  The more she blames others for her behavior
or reaction to other's behavior, the more she steps in to deep water. She
can tell her self others are to blame, but she knows deep inside it is not
others. What a river of tears to come forth when she reckons with  reality
coming to the front of her head, and filling her heart. You're right God is
in control, and continual prayer on her behalf is what is called for by
god. Ever wonder if god is in control, yet we are to pray, what  that must
look like to him? It is not like he needs us to tell him what to do, or to
ask him what to do, he certainly doesn't need a bunch of spiritual
cheerleaders or advisors lol. Yet his word demands we pray for others, bare
their burdens, and etc. Perhaps it is for our benefit more so than those
whom we pray for.

Brad