Hi Phil,
Not sure where my 18 or 19 year old nephew stands on drugs.  I think he has
at least dabbled as my mom found pot seeds he was trying to get to grow in a
travel trailer he lived in on her land.
My brother, his father did drugs all through the time he was growing up and
I am sure he has seen enough to tell him that it's the wrong way to go, but
the other side to that is, the biggest group of physical abusers, drug
abusers, alcohol abusers, cigarette smokers and so on are those who grew up
in a home where that sort of behavior went on.  Parenting is more caught
than taught they say.  I hope that your grand children escape the wake that
your daughter's behavior has created or that she so drastically changes her
behavior that they follow in the wake of her good behavior instead of the
bad.
I know it is probably hard to have your daughter out of your immediate
control but it's that free will thing god gave us.  Besides, she'd be
working that rather she was in or out of the place she is in just now.  If
she was out she would have the added stress of the evils in the outside
world working against her as well.
As a present, I had a set of Jimmy Evans's teachings on how they raised
there children sent to my brother.  He wanted the set but couldn't justify
spending the money on it.  Or, maybe he didn't have the money to spend.
Anyway, Terri didn't trust him enough for me to loan him our set so I just
went ahead and paid for a new one and sent them to him.
I know I shouldn't but I can't help wondering what he thought when he
reached the end of the set and Evan's answers some of the parenting
questions some people wrote and asked of him.
One of those questions went something like this.
My child is grown now but while he was growing up I was a bad image barer to
him.  What can I do for him now?
I think Jimmy's response was to just go to the adult child and repent or own
up and apologize.
It's hard for kids not to blame there parents for some of the bad parenting
practices they grew up under but it's part of maturity to over come and rise
above it I think.
I am in my early 30's and my brother is in his late thirties and we both
still have problems with this.
We see huge problems in the way we were raised but we also see some of the
history of our parents and we understand how they could have made some of
the mistakes they did considering there up bringing.
My mother was kicked out of her house by her own mother at age 13 and she
had her first child by age 15 I think.  Her parents divorced and her father
was an alcoholic.  My father's father was abusive toward his wife and he was
the only child of my grandparents but he had a sister who was from a
previous marriage of his father's.
My grandmother treated the girl terrible since she wasn't her own child and
of course she doted on her own child, my father.
Both my mother and my grandmother were abused by their husbands but both
adjitated their husbands to provoke fights and I never understood that.
Guess it goes back to any attention is good attention even if it is
negative.
Anyway, families are a mess the world over.
Good luck with yours and wish me luck with mine.


Matt

James 1 2 and 3
Count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing
of your faith produces patience.