Amen, Helen, amen.

I am not sure what Phil was meaning about what someone had said that wasn't
what he said . . . or whatever it was, but I pray that if anyone has hurt
him in any way that they will be able to go to him and say a big "Sorry" for
he loves us all and has helped many of us out of some big dung heaps!


--
Carol



----- Original Message -----
From: "Helen" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Monday, January 12, 2004 10:17 PM
Subject: Phil's departure


> This is a sad day for this list!!  No other member here will be able to
> bring to this list the love, the wisdom, the righteous attitude, the same
> close relationship with God displayed in Phil's ministry to us.  Each of
us
> is unique in the Kingdom of God, each of us a part of the ministry of
> reconciliation, and when one is tread upon by insensitivity to his or her
> thoughts and service, or criticized for it, we all suffer.
>
> I pray that God will comfort and strengthen Phil as he waits before the
> Lord for direction for the next steps in his devoted life to God.
>
> In Him,
> Helen
>
> At 09:45 AM 1/12/04 -0700, you wrote:
> >It has taken me awhile to realize that the Almighty doesn't need me to
> >defend His power or love or healing power for others.  Unbelief, however,
is
> >tremendously effective.  Even Jesus was stymied by the unbelief of
others.
> >Read Mark 6:4-6.  I am no healer, of course, and I have no power except
for
> >that of the Holy Spirit and his ministry to others.  It is time for a
> >change.  The Lord has been speaking to me about such in the background.
A
> >year ago, at the Lord's direction, I signed off all my mailing lists and
> >those I actually owned, I turned over to others.  I discontinued my
> >newsletter and the phone book files for the blind I had been editing for
9
> >years.  I dropped a number of website domains except for my personal
website
> >called red white and blue dot org and the latest one I felt the Lord told
me
> >to established which you all know is called safe place fellowship which
just
> >so happens to be what we call our Friday night prayer meetings.  The
other
> >four domains I dropped just recently.  I have even considered dropping my
> >personal website but am still thinking about that one.  I kept echurch
> >because I didn't feel I could give up my one Christian contact.  However,
> >new things are beginning to surface.  We are praying about starting a new
> >church where we can minister to people according to the Scriptures.  This
is
> >currently in addition to our Friday night prayer meetings we have had in
our
> >home for probably about a year now.  The Holy Spirit seems to be speaking
to
> >me about things which require a dedicated focus.  I love the internet and
> >the communication with others all over the world.  I remember when I
first
> >got on the internet.  When I was doing DOS tutorials, I was asked by the
> >Egyptian government to donate my tutorials to them so they could
translate
> >them into Arabic which they would then, in turn, have someone read them
back
> >on to tape.  This was for their computer lab they had established in
Cairo
> >just for the blind.  I even got a letter from a general on the Egyptian
> >cabinet thanking me for helping them.  Later those same tapes were
> >translated into Spanish for South America blind students learning how to
use
> >computers.  So, in short, it has been quite rewarding at times.  My life,
as
> >most of you know, has radically changed in the last couple of years.  I
have
> >been privileged to see the Lord do things that two years ago I never
dreamed
> >I would witness.  Recently, I have felt I have not been focusing on
things
> >spiritually as I should.  I love the internet and echurch in particular
but
> >at the same time, it seems the Lord is telling me to focus on something
> >which would take me away from the realm of the internet.  As I said, I
love
> >the internet and it is a wonderful tool but it is also a toy and perhaps
a
> >toy I take too seriously.  I feel strongly about keeping safe place
> >fellowship dot com due to the nature of the site.  I hear from people,
who
> >have dialed up the website through doing searches on search engines, who
are
> >very hurting frightened people.  The Lord told me last summer, following
an
> >hour of intercessory prayer, that this was who I am now.  I cannot change
> >that because somehow it is an answer to prayer.  It is my job, therefore,
to
> >take the place of others in order that they might walk free.  It isn't
easy
> >listening to the pain and fears and horrible experiences people have had
in
> >the past as we pray together in order that the Lord might heal their
> >woundedness because I have the tendency to take things personally.  My
> >ministry takes me to places that are very painful for me to hear, yet it
is
> >who I am.  I pray with suicides cases and with people who have tried
suicide
> >as a way out.  I pray with people who still want to kill themselves.  I
pray
> >with sexually abused people and rape victims.
> >  I pray with people who grew up being hated by their father and now live
a
> >life of fear and doubts and sadness that defies human understanding.  I
pray
> >with people who have lost loved ones and the grief has simply taken over
> >their life; causing them dysfunctionality in their adult life.  I pray
with
> >people who live with horrible nightmares that keep them awake half the
> >night.  I pray with people who, in spite of what some may believe, are
> >afflicted with demons and are tormented.  I pray with people who have
> >multiple personalities due to the trauma they suffered as a child.  You
> >might think a person could get depressed themselves as a result of all
this
> >but frankly, I have never been so happy because for once in my life, I
know
> >I am walking free and doing the perfect will of God in my life.  There is
no
> >greater joy than to be absolutely positive you are walking in God's
perfect
> >will.  It is going to be very difficult for me to subtract myself from a
> >majority of my internet activities but now seems to be God's timing.  I
> >could be wrong, of course, and it wouldn't be the first time but these
> >thoughts have been bumping around in my spirit for a long time.
> >Additionally, the burden I carry for people when I hear the things they
are
> >facing, sometimes gets pretty heavy.  The only way I know of dealing with
> >that burden is through intercessory prayer.  I should be spending a whole
> >lot more time in prayer than I am and that, in and of itself, is no easy
> >task.  Yet, I am pretty certain that is what needs to be done for me.  I
> >often feel the Lord is taking me some place but so far He hasn't shown me
> >that, or where, that is.  So, this is to say goodbye for now.  I may be
back
> >but my private email is always available because I write to a lot of
people
> >who write to me about what they are facing.  Some of them I pray with on
the
> >phone when required and some just use email.  Additionally, I am working
on
> >a project that takes a lot of hours of my time.  I don't even know if the
> >Lord is going to use it but it is something that parallels the ministry I
am
> >in.  So, if you need anything, Vicki is always here.  Technically, she
now
> >owns the echurch mailing list anyhow and I am just in a secondary
moderator
> >position so nothing relating to the list will change.  I love each one of
> >you and though you don't know it, if you needed help in some way, I would
be
> >the first person there.  Remember that your Lord and Savior has a very
safe
> >place for you and that you can walk in His perfect will.  However, in
every
> >one of us, as He still does in me, He wants to heal pain and woundedness
> >that keeps us spiritually off balance so we cannot do His will and reach
> >others.  Unfortunately, I take things personally but I finally realized
this
> >is do to my calling as an intercessor and such things have to be turned
over
> >to the Lord for Him to carry as He commanded.  I feel as if there are
some
> >other things the Lord may be wanting me to do and maybe it is time to
find
> >out.  I trust you will continue to enjoy the list and it will be a
blessing
> >to you.  Remember, Vicki is here and she has control of all list
commands.
> >I can't say if I'll be back or not; only the Lord knows that.  There are
> >some people I need to reach, however, and when God gives you an
assignment,
> >it is really difficult to say no to the one who heals you.  Please don't
> >reply to this on the list because I am signing off after sending this
> >message or at least, shortly afterward.  God has blessed you.
> >
> >Complete In Him.
> >
> >Phil.
> >Crazy For Jesus
> >www.SafePlaceFellowship.com
>