<<Disclaimer: Verify this information before applying it to your situation.>> Hello List Members: I received a wide range of responses on this one (see below for original question) ranging from "the daughter is rude and in considerate" to "the mother should have tactfully mentioned the flour dust" to "what was she doing sitting in the same room as an open bag of flour" to "I don't really see that there are any social implications to having CD." I was suprised at the number of people who commented on the quality of the mother-daughter relationship - many of these were hurtful so I have chosen not to repeat them. I was also suprised that a few people said they would take a little taste so as not to hurt their hostess's feelings. Generally, it seemed to make quite a difference whether or not one should make a fuss, depending on the closeness of the relationship involved. The following response sums it up: - I think that if it is your daughter or son or a close relative, there is absolutely nothing wrong in letting them know of your restraints, and also asking for cooperation. Wouldn't they expect the same from you?? I agree with "not making a fuss" if it is an acquaintance, a work situation, or if I am at a party amongst alot of different people whom I am not that close to............. Here are some more responses: - Re: the mother who did not drink the tea but said nothing. I'd say she missed an opportunity to quietly educate her daughter - not with crossness or implied guilt, but a gentle reminder of how easy it is to make a celiac sick. People need to learn to be sensitive to the needs of others in many ways. This is only one way, but an important one. I am sure the girl loved her mother and would not want to make her sick. - What we have to do is not try to be a mouse in the corner, but be the pleasant lap dog that has some very specific needs. - I will never stay quiet - its in my best interest. - I think your friend did the classy and respectful thing - didn't make a fuss. - The situation that you described, in my opinion, has nothing to do with celiac. I think we all have different personalities and we all would have handled that situation in our own way. - The only time I run into problems is when someone makes something "just for" me... since I have no control over the conditions under which something was made and asking if their kitchen was "completely clean of all traces of wheat" could be really rude, I just thank them politely, serve myself a piece, perhaps even take a nibble, thank them profusely, and then find somewhere discrete to dispose of it. - I am pretty frank about it. I don't eat wheat "poison" myself and would not dream of serving it to anyone else. Don't be afraid to advocate for us whenever the opportunity arrives. We need to raise the public consciousness. - Would she have been as polite and not wanting to make a fuss if it was arsenic or rat poison? Here is the original post: <<Disclaimer: Verify this information before applying it to your situation.>> Dear List Members: I've been thinking a lot lately about the social implications of having celiac diease, and wondering how others deal with awkward social situations. For instance, the following story was related to me by a fellow celiac: "I was at my daughter's house(non-celiac) for tea one afternoon and she decided to bake some cookies. As she measured and scooped out the ingredients, a cloud of wheat flour dust settled over the table upon which I had set my cup of tea. I quietly pushed my cup away and didn't drink any more of it. I didn't say anything because I don't like to cause a fuss." Would anyone like to comment on this topic? * Please include your location in all posts about products * ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---- *Support summarization of posts, reply to the SENDER not the CELIAC List*