I had a similar problem with my kids (1 allergic almost 4 year old and a 5 year old with no allergies. By the way, I have celiac disease and diabetes). I decided to make and serve only foods that everyone could enjoy in order to keep it easy on myself. Between work and the children and all of the other challenges on our time, we decided this was 1 place where we could control the level of stress and did what we could to reduce it. Of course there are a few exceptions. I try to limit those to foods where the allergen free products are very expensive (for example, wheat-free vs. wheat-based pastas and breads). When the allergy free product is pretty dismal (like dairy free cheeses) we all stopped eating them and none of us really miss them. This has worked pretty well for my family and both of my kids (now almost 5 and almost 4) know what each of us can and can not eat. This approach is easy for me since I have never been a fan of prepared foods or mixes. I discovered long ago that I could usually make the same thing better and cheaper by starting from scratch with a minimal amount of extra time or effort. Special occasions like parties at my house have plenty of wheat-free and gluten-free and dairy-free food choices. If someone brings along something else, I usually put it out after the kids have become involved with something other than food just so I can relax and enjoy the party rather than constantly patrolling the house to see what my son is eating now. Parties at someone else's home requires a more watchful eye. My husband and I trade off the responsibility so we all get some time to enjoy the party. Educating schools and daycare providers has been a little more of a challenge. My son is in family day care where he is fed 2 meals and 2 snacks daily. I have given the provider a list of foods as well as recipes for Paul. I also give her "safe" bread, treats, milk-substitutes, pastas, cereals, et c. She accomodates Paul's restrictions, but limits him as well. She likes to serve the kids meals with sauces and gravies. Rather than try to make them without milk or wheat, she gives Paul foods without the sauce. The other kids get Swedish meatballs on noodles; Paul gets little round balls of plain ground meat on rice. Fortunately, Paul doesn't seem to mind. We have reinforced that his food is special and good for him. I think as he gets older this may be more of a problem. For right now, though, he's cool with it. Cathy in CT [log in to unmask]