Last picture show mississippi I went into the junk shop expecting to barter over what looked like a 57 Philco tv ; here they watch what kind of pick up you pull up in and price you accordingly ; I am told ithe practice is as old as Hercaleum and Pompeii ; you know same ka ka different day . I parked my used chariot outside and ambled in with my hat brim turned up trying to show off my education by singing 'Howzitgoing The good woman who i surprized was up on a library ladder trying to steady some hat boxes that were full of paper reciepts ; just as I came in they and she started to rock and tumble all at the same time ; as a survivor of 911 I know when to run faster than a speeding bullet I caught her and the ladder just at what engineers refer to as the "moment " and your mother might call her unmentionables. Since I was the hero of the moment ; I didn't get my face slaped ;I just stood there holding her while she got her footing ;when just then I hear the shop door open and someone come in ."are you all right ?" a woman asks the lady on the ladder Its a woman architect who has hired me and I am supposed to meet her here outside to look at a building Ive never met her before but i recognize her voice from my phone conversations I m ok ' the woman responds struggling to get her footing but I don't know about him ? We must of looked like a circus act ; you know the donkey and the tail ; Right now all I am to this visitor is a haircut and if i could I would keep it that way ; ; I mean you never know how its all going to play in Mayberry I ask the good woman on the ladder to please climb up a little so she can get her footing and I can be free of her unmentionables ; She obliges and i pop free with a beet red face and hair sporting the egg beater look .Unable to properly explain myself I begin to gamble a little and introduce myself in a nervous effort to break the ice. and as I do so the good shopkeeper decends the ladder smiling and also shakes my hand thanking me while insisting to the architect visitor "its not how it looks";" So far so good sez I Thankfully she decribes in detail what happened ; 'He really was a hero "she insists " and came to my rescue My client is a good sport and lets me off the hook then we say our good byes to the shop keeper but not before she asks us what are you doing here anyway? . the woman architect responds that we are going to inspect a building next door "and this is my crack expert ".. . well the room went stone dead ..now it was the architects turn to back peddle meanwhile I stare at my shoe and wonder how its all going to end when the good woman on the ladder pipes up and ends it all by saying she will give me a good recomendation . The architects report however never mentions any cracks ; only fissures ; Py . ************** Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? Read reviews on AOL Autos. (http://autos.aol.com/cars-Volkswagen-Jetta-2009/expert-review?ncid=aolaut00030000000007 ) -- To terminate puerile preservation prattling among pals and the uncoffee-ed, or to change your settings, go to: <http://listserv.icors.org/archives/bullamanka-pinheads.html>