Ken, Thanks! Just what I needed! On 7/9/07, ken barber <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > Now that I have expressed the deep dark concerns for > the world I'd better lighten the mood. > > > > > > > Bad Leg > > > A man goes into the doctor. > > He says, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's > wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll hear > it!" > > The doctor cautiously placed his ear to the man's > thigh, only to hear, "Gimme 20 bucks. I really need > 20 bucks." > > "I've never seen or heard anything like this before. > How long has this been going on?" The doctor asked. > > "That's nothing Doc. Put your ear to my knee." > > The doctor put his ear to the man's knee and heard > it say, "Man, I really need 10 dollars. Just lend me > 10 bucks!!" > > "Sir, I really don't know what to tell you. I've > never seen anything like this." The doctor was > dumbfounded. > > "Wait Doc, that's not all. There's more, just put > your ear up to my ankle," the man urged him. > > The doctor did as the man said and was blown away to > hear his ankle plead, "Please, I just need 5 dollars. > Lend me 5 bucks, please, if you will." > > "I have no idea what to tell you. There's nothing > about it in my books," he said, as he frantically > searched all his medical reference books. > > "I can make a well educated guess though," he > continued. "Based on life and all my previous > experience, I can tell you that yourleg seems to be > broke in three places." > > > Free drinks for everyone > > > One night, a drunk comes stumbling into a bar and > says to the bartender: "Drinks for all on me > including you, bartender." So the bartender follows > the mans orders and says: "That will be $36.50 > please." The drunk says he has no money so the > bartender slaps him around and throws him out. > > The next night the same drunk comes in again and > orders a drink for everyone in the bar including the > bartender. Again the bartender follows instructions > and again the drunk says he has no money. So the > bartender slaps him around and throws him out. > > On the third night he comes in, the drunk orders > drinks for all except the bartender. "What, no drink > for me?" replies the bartender. "Oh, no. You get > violent when you drink." > > > Well Done > > John was furious when his steak arrived too rare. > > "Waiter," he shouted, "Didn't you hear me say 'well > done'?" > > "I can't thank you enough, sir," replied the waiter. > "I hardly ever get a compliment." > > > > > > ____________________________________________________________________________________ > Need a vacation? Get great deals > to amazing places on Yahoo! Travel. > http://travel.yahoo.com/ > > ----------------------- > > To change your mail settings or leave the C-PALSY list, go here: > > http://listserv.icors.org/SCRIPTS/WA-ICORS.EXE?SUBED1=c-palsy > -- Kendall An unreasonable man (but my wife says that's redundant!) The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man. -George Bernard Shaw 1856-1950 ----------------------- To change your mail settings or leave the C-PALSY list, go here: http://listserv.icors.org/SCRIPTS/WA-ICORS.EXE?SUBED1=c-palsy