Thanks Phil I sent it to the other list -- Christ is either Lord of all or he is not Lord at all. Karen Carter '74 > A very oldie but goodie. > > Phil. > > > > Subject: Computer: Male or Female? > > > > > > As you may well know, Hebrew nouns have a gender. When the time came > > to translate the word "Computer" to Hebrew, its gender had to be decided. > > They established two expert committees, one of men and the other of women. > > Each committee was instructed to decide on the machine's gender - > > "Machshev" (male form) or "Machshevet" (female form), and to give five > > main reasons. > > The women's committee recommended that computers be male, because: > > 1. To get their attention, you have to turn them on. > > 2. They will usually do what they are asked, but nothing more, and > they > > won't think of doing it themselves. > > 3. They are supposed to solve your problems, but most of the time > > they are the problem. > > 4. As soon as you are committed to one, you find out that had you > > waited just a little bit longer, you would have got a better > > model. > > 5. They usually become outdated in five years and need to be > > replaced, but some of the users feel that they have > > already invested so much in that > > darn machine they put up with an imperfect model. > > On the other hand, the men's committee claimed the computers should > be > > female (what else), because: > > 1. No one but the Creator understands their inner logic. > > 2. The language they use to communicate among themselves is > > incomprehensible to anyone else. > > 3. Even your slightest error is maintained in long-term memory for > use > > at a later date. > > 4. The error message "Bad command or file name" is about as > > informative as "If you don't know why I am mad at > > you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you!!!" > > 5. Once you are committed to one, you find yourself spending half > > your payroll on accessories for her. > >