Hey, we should form a band.   Your car or mine?  My favourite frequent driving instrument is the three-holed fipple flute, the type used in early renaissance times to play pipe and tabour as a one man band.   The three-holed flute is capable of almost two octaves. so you and play almost anything, and since it only takes one hand, it is no less safe than a cell phone.   I made mine out of a piece of white 1/2" pvc pipe about 9" long, trying some test holes for initial tuning and scotch tape to adjust the pitch until the right positions were found.  However, piping and drumming at the same time is like patting your head and rubbing your tummy.   The only practical problem is that out on the highway, it looks like I am smoking something and that has led to some careful attention by the RCMP on occasion.

The other instrument I am now doing some serious practicing on is the cornetto, or mute cornette, a renaissance instrument with finger holes like a recorder and a mouthpiece like a French horn but much smaller.   Driving the three hours between workplaces is allowing lots of good time for embouchure building.   It is fun to play along with cd's, but since many early music ensembles play at 415 pitch and my instrument is at 440, it can be hard to match the pitch!    However, embouchure practice is one thing, making music is another, and I always feel a bit at risk when driving with knees and sticking the horn through the steering wheel so all the finger holes can be used.   Driving with knees is no sweat, but the fear is the thought of getting bashed on the chops if a flat tire hauled suddenly on the steering wheel.

Maybe we could make some beautiful music together this summer at the end of July when I visit Ithaca for our IHS Class of '58 graduation 45th anniversary celebration picnic at Stewart Park.    Anyone else an auto-musician?

cp in bc


  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Ken Follett 
  To: [log in to unmask] 
  Sent: Wednesday, April 16, 2003 2:06 PM
  Subject: Toothless Guy


  A little bitty flash riff w/ "music" as a theme...

  I’m the toothless guy and I like music. For the last fifteen years I have been driving each morning and evening from Long Island to my office in Brooklyn. In total I spend usually five hours per day in the car trying to get to work or to home where I eat, toot and sleep. In the first years I would listen to the radio, whatever station would play music. I would listen to anything, jazz, hip-hop, rap, koto, classical, pop, tuba, rock n’ roll, bolero, electronic, blues, Celtic, new wave, zydeco you name it I’ve heard it on the radio. Sometimes I’ve heard it twice. Then one snowy day when I was not getting anywhere very fast I stopped listening to the radio. I shut the damned noise box off. I was feeling dependent, not in control of my destiny. After that I drove for hours and hours, days and weeks and months with nothing but the sounds in my head. I have tenitus. I hear an incessant buzzing. At first I thought it was the car. Then I realized that I heard the buzzing when I was not in the car. When I sit on the john with my pants around my ankles I hear buzzing. I complained to my doctor and had my ears tested and the technician, speaking too softly, told me something irrelevant that I forget. It was like the time I told my doctor that my shoulder hurt and she sent me to the podiatrist. I went back out on the road. The life of a long distance commuter is like living in a tin monastery. Bored with listening to myself I began playing the Jew’s harp. I hold the harp in one hand, the metal arms between my lips, brace my knees on the steering wheel and plunk plunk plunk myself along the expressway. I learned 7-Eleven or Doubles. One weekend I drove fifty miles on the Thruway without once touching the wheel with my hands. I can also peel a grapefruit. I did not know enough songs for fifty miles and had to make up my own tunes. Creativity is not my strength. I have calluses on my lips now that they no longer bleed. Soothing lip balm makes the harp slip and slide and it takes a while to build up a tough lip. After I got the hang of it I went on to master the Who’s rock opera Tommy. Teeth rattle and roll. Then I went on to Vivaldi’s seasons. Bach and Vivaldi adapt well to the Jew’s harp and motoring. Plunk plunk plunk. Driver’s look at me from their vehicles and I stop playing long enough to smile and cheerily wave at them. Sometimes I jerk my foot on the accelerator, or the brake depending, in time with the music. At one time I thought about the kazoo, or the nose flute but I found myself hyperventilating with breathing instruments and you can’t smoke at the same time. Let me tell you, passing out while driving is not good. Particularly not good when your cigarette falls into the seat and you hit your head on the wheel and then the horn honks and everybody on the road looks at you. It is kind of embarrassing. When the traffic stops you need to be alert to put your foot down. Insurance costs are skyrocketing. I heard about a commuter in Hartford, Connecticut that took up the accordion. I understand they can work like an air bag. Speaking of air bags, my cousin Mike took up the Scottish bagpipes, but he is a stock analyst and has a driver, which is not quite fair. In the last few weeks, after my most recent dental work, I’ve taken up the kalimba. I find it is a bit of a hassle to hold the steering wheel steady and pluck the metal reeds, but there is a glimmer of promise. If the kalimba does not work then I may switch to bluegrass banjo.

  XXX