I wasn't commenting on that - the child support portion was what I was commenting on - and the states involvement in the amount - depending on the amount of the child support and the years he paid it and the amount of college donation - he could be paying the same amount both ways. Would he have paid more or less if it was voluntary? The state the amount - don't know how - Virginia has 600 limit and that is divided between the two incomes - by the percentage you put in. He will have paid - $36,000 in child support ( over 12 years) and he has no intention of helping with college or helping buy a car. In the mean time - I have put out - $65,000, and that doesn't count - the cost of her medical care - like insurance - which I carry and the co-pays and left over balances, nor the up and coming college amount of ?????? - nor the $15,000 for new car. I truly don't begudge him his money - okay so he has new Honda motorcycle and a new car and new digital camera nad computer and other stuff - I do begudge him the extra time I am away from Amber - so we can live. He spends no time with Amber, never calls her and until recently spazed out with the child support - the kid had no money and lost mom time. The kids want me home. When Jackie was living there - she waitress part-time and gave me money so I could stay home with them. The kids need us and our presence, and child support can help with that. We only have kids for such a short time, shouldn't at least be with them then? Trisha > i think kyle has already said he intends to continue with money for > college > voluntarily. > > -----Original Message----- > From: Trisha Cummings [mailto:[log in to unmask]] > Sent: Monday, June 03, 2002 10:53 AM > To: [log in to unmask] > Subject: Re: current events > > > I don't see what the difference is - one should voluntarily pay for one > kids > - you do for the ones that live with - infact if you consider how much the > cost per month - child support usually looks piddly next it - I get $250 a > month Amber, and put out at least $700. I get nothing for Alex and put out > the same amount. I arrive at this by dividing the house, utilities and > food > by three - then adding individual costs. Imagine the mess I would be in if > I > didn't work 3 jobs. And this says nothing about the time spent running > them > around and vacations etc. Why does it matter that the state set limit? If > you checked out the number kids who never get child support like Alex, > perhaps you would understand the necessity for state set limits. The sad > truth is many people value money over people. Hate your ex-wife by all > means > but don't begrudge you child your support - finanacially or emotionally. > It > is not the child fault. > > Trisha > > > > Biggest raise I've ever had in my life, but college starts this fall > > <sigh>. > > Oh well, at least it's Dad's decision to open his wallst, and not the > > State > > doing it for him! > > > > -----Original Message----- > > From: BG Greer, PhD [mailto:[log in to unmask]] > > Sent: Monday, June 03, 2002 10:19 AM > > To: [log in to unmask] > > Subject: Re: current events > > > > > > In a message dated 6/3/02 8:13:33 AM, [log in to unmask] writes: > > > > >eh, congratsa kyle... > > > > Me too, Kyle. Now you, Laura and the kids will have more "cheese" to go > > around. > > > > Bobby