And I can hear the villian saying, in the manner of "The Perils of Pauline," -- "Curses, foiled again!" <sneer> when they don't take over the world. Kat "St. John's University Cerebral Palsy List" <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > Hey guys! A colleague sent this. Thought it was good for a chuckle = (Deri, you might vant to tak ze speshal not ): -----Original Message----- From: Randall, Ellen=20 Sent: Monday, March 18, 2002 11:24 AM To: Cleveland, Kyle E. Subject: FW: EuroEnglish or is it German Kyle, I sent this to John Minnich this a.m. Since he forwarded it to = Tim and Joe, I thought you too might enjoy it. Ellen ---- The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English=A0will=A0be the official language of the EU rather than = German, which was the other=A0=A0possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that=A0English=A0spelling had some room for improvement and has = accepted a 5-year=A0phase-in=A0plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish." In the first year, "s" will=A0replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this = will make the sivil servants jump=A0with=A0joy. The hard "c" will be = dropped in favor of the "k:" This should klear=A0up=A0konfusion and keyboards kan = have one less letter.=A0=A0There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the = sekond year, when the=A0troublesome "ph" will be replased with the "f." This = will make words=A0like=A0"fotograf" 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new=A0spelling kan be = expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated=A0changes=A0are = possible.=A0Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have=A0=A0always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the = horible=A0mes of=A0=A0the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful and they should = go away. By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"=A0with=A0"z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary = "o" kan be dropd=A0from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors = be aplid to=A0ozer=A0kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no=A0mor=A0=A0trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu = understand ech ozer. ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!!! And zen ve vil take over ze vorld!!!!