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GAMBIA-L  January 2004

GAMBIA-L January 2004

Subject:

Re: FW: JOB DESCRIPTION

From:

Jabou Joh <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

The Gambia and related-issues mailing list <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Thu, 15 Jan 2004 19:16:11 EST

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (99 lines)

Soffie,

No onw would apply but you find out the details of the job after you already
have it, so there is no choice in the matter. Forced labour I say. But we love
it anyway although sometimes you have to wonder if you will ever survive it.

Jabou

In a message dated 1/15/04 1:45:44 PM Central Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:
>
>
> How many of us would have applied?  Hilarious.
>
> Soffie
>
>
>   POSITION:
> Mother, Mom, Mama, Mommy
>
>        JOB DESCRIPTION:
>        Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in
>        an, often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent
>        communication and organizational skills and be willing to work
>        variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and
>        frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required,
>        including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and
>        endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not
>        reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.
>
>        RESPONSIBILITIES:
>        The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least
>        temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue
>        repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule
>        and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case,
>        this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying
>        wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such
>        as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck
>        zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate
>        production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan
>        and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental
>        outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an
>        embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety
>        testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated
>        devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the
>        worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of
>        the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
>        janitorial work throughout the facility.
>
>        POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT &PROMOTION:
>        Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for
>        years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your
>        skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you
>
>        PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
>        None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a
>        continually exhausting basis.
>
>        WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
>        Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A
>        balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption
>        that college will help them become financially independent. When you
>        die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this
>        reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you
>        could only do more.
>
>        BENEFITS:
>        While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition
>        reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered;
>        this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and
>        free hugs for life if you play your cards right.
>
>        Forward this on to all the Moms you know, in appreciation for
>        everything they do on a daily basis, and let them know they are
>        appreciated.
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> To Search in the Gambia-L archives, go to:
> http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/CGI/wa.exe?S1=gambia-l
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> at: http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/archives/gambia-l.html
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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