>I've got a question:  what's the deal with you changing your name all the
time?


    After I lost over 100 lbs, things were different.  All of a sudden, I
noticed that I was dressing in a suit and tie everyday, after years of being
CONDEMNED to sweat pants.  I was able to fit in physically, and socially,
where I used to not be able to.  I looked into the mirror one day and felt a
sort of sexual attraction to my own reflection, felt a power and penetrating
senuality, when all my life I thought myself as an Ugly Fat Bastard.
    I've been fat all myself.  In America, that means being hated all my
life.  When enough people think that being fat is a reason to be hated, you
start believing it.  Now that I'm not fat any longer, I don't want to were
sweat pants (fat people's clothes), drink diet soda (fat people's swill), or
be called Karl McKinnon (the name of a fat git who's failed at everything
he's ever attempted).
    After thinking about names for a while, I made up a list.  I narrowed
down the list to Lochlyn, Nathen, Kaiden, Dante, Rayder or Vidale.  I
figured Fox or Christante for last names.  Dante Christante invites to much
Picante jokes.  Vidale Christante is just too much.  I showed my whole list
of names to a  bunch of women, mostly online personals and relatives.  The
favorites where Kaiden and Dante.  While the guys like Nathen, including me,
I got sick and tired of people spelling the name Nathan after about a week.
I also have no intention of ever been called "Nate."  So, I figured I'd go
with the ladies' chioce  and change it to Kaiden.  Nothing's official until
I sign the form, and under Wisconsin state law no one gets to change their
name if they are a state-liscensed employee, including rent-a-cops making $7
an hour.