:)

From the Ledgers of Leighroy:

Though I've just given birth to a heifer
And of pride and of milk I am full,
It is sad to relate
That my tactical state
Was not brought on by a bull.

I have never been naughty, I swear it
In spite of this calf I have born
By Farmer Brown's tractor,
I am virgo intacta
And I've not had the bull by the horn.

How dreary the farmyard and the meadow,
The cow shed seems gloomy and grey,
But the one bit of gun
In the years weary run
Has by science been taken away.

I know that the farm is a business,
Where all of us must pull out weight,
But I'd pull and I'd pull
For a nicely built bull,
But get this phoney arrangement I hate.

It must not be thought that I'm jealous,
These are things that a cow shouldn't say,
but these A.I. tarts
Who handle our parts
Still get it the old fashioned way.