Spread  the Stupidity 

Only  in America  ...do drugstores make the sick

walk  all the way to the back of the store to get their  prescriptions while 
healthy people can buy cigarettes  at the front.
 
[Because  the exercise attenuates health - Haruna]  


Only in America  ...do people order double cheeseburgers,  large fries, and   
a  diet-coke. 
[Freedom of Choice -  Haruna]

Only in
America  ...do banks leave both doors open  and then chain the pens to  the  
counters.
[To  give the impression of security for your investment -  Haruna] 

Only in America  ...do we leave cars 
worth thousands of dollars in the 
driveway  and put our useless junk in the garage. 
 
[For safekeeping until we donate them or for  that garage sale in the spring. 
In America, we are encouraged to give and sell  what is well-kept - Haruna]



Only in America  ...do we buy hot dogs in packages of  ten and buns in 
packages of eight.  
[So we can share the  remaining two dogs to our neighbour - Haruna] 

Only  in
America  ...do we use the word 'politics' to  describe the process so well: 
'Poli' in Latin meaning  ' many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. 
['Poly' in Latin means variety. 'Ticks' means  perspectives of the clock - 
Haruna] 

Only in America  ...do they have drive-up ATM machines  with Braille 
lettering. 
[To honour the blind members of our society -  Haruna]

EVER WONDER .

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our  skin ? 
[The hair shades our skin from the sun -  Haruna] 

Why women can't put on mascara with  their 
mouth  closed? 
[In deference to our women-folk, no comment -  Haruna] 

Why don't you ever see the headline 

'Psychic  Wins Lottery'? 
The Psychic wins the winners of lottery, she takes her  chances elsewhere - 
Haruna]

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word? 

[To encourage you in brevity in communication. Your  time is valuable - 
Haruna] 

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

[Practicing to be  God, Never perfecting God - Haruna] 

Why is lemon juice made with  artificial flavor, 
and  dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? 
[Lemon Juice cleans  dirt better than it nourishes - Haruna] 

Why is the man who invests all your  money 
called  a broker? 
[The lazy s.o.b. breaks you to get rich -  Haruna] 

Why is the time of day with the slowest  traffic 
called  rush hour? 
[Hurry-up and wait -  Haruna] 

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
[To discourage wanton murder -  Haruna] 



Why didn't Noah swat those  two  mosquitoes? 
[Mosquitoes are food for  frogs and lizards - Haruna] 

Why do they sterilize the needle  for  

lethal  injections? 
[They  don't want to commit murder by infestation -  Haruna]

You know that indestructible black  box that is 
used  on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole  plane out of that stuff?! 
[Fly at your own risk -  Haruna] 

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

[The rains help grow their food -  Haruna]
Why are they called apartments when  they are all  stuck together? 
[Spread apart by  walls - Haruna]

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite  of progress? 
No. Its a club of  con-artists: Haruna]

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the  terminal? 
[Flying by humans is  not safe, plus it invades the territory of birds 
without proper ornithological  clearance - Haruna]

Now that  you've smiled at least once, 

it's  your turn to spread the stupidity and 

send  this to someone you want to bring a 

smile  to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send  it to everyone. We 
all need to smile every once  in a while.
[says  the con-artist; I'm not smiling. Cleverness makes me smile  more. 
Haruna]



**************Create a Home Theater Like the Pros. Watch the video on AOL 
Home.      
(http://home.aol.com/diy/home-improvement-eric-stromer?video=15?ncid=aolhom00030000000001)

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