This is a discussion between two Gambian Sisters who were reflecting on the
roles of women at home.  This started by looking at the roles of the older
generation.

We were speaking about the difference between today's Gambian husband, and
that of generations past.  As we conversed, we stumbled across the topic
regarding how our moms were submissive to our dads, by calling them
"Nijai/M'Baring" as they
addressed them, and how that was  seen as a sign of respect towards one's
husband.  In our generation though, we've noticed that when we do that (be it
teasingly or seriously), they tend to be uncomfortable about it.  Some of us
are even chased around the compound when we do that.   This brought us to the
decent conclusion that some of our men have made some progress because they:
-love our independence
-are proud of us for setting goals for ourselves
-are not afraid of us reaching beyond their achievements

Another conclusion we reached, was that the men who are serious about
education do not seem to be intimidated by the independent, academically
sound Gambian woman's because those women are not seen as threats, but jewels
in Gambian society.

To those brothers who make us feel good about ourselves; who make us feel
loved and not afraid to give us the opportunity to reach for the moon and
stars, we say CONGRATULATIONS, and keep up the good work!

We still have a long way to go though, because we still have a majority of
men who do not seem to encourage their women's growth and development
economically.  Majority of women have no time for their own development: The
woman rises at 6 a.m. and prepares breakfast for the family and for herself,
which they will eat at midmorning. After fetching water from the tap or well,
she heads for her plot of land and it may be an hour's walk away. Until about
4:00 p.m. in the afternoon, she still, weeds or waters the land, stopping
only briefly to eat whatever food she has taken with her. The two remaining
hours of daylight are used to cut firewood and to collect food for the
family, all which she carries home.

Usually, she arrives home as the sun is setting. Now there is work to be done
preparing the supper, a task that may occupy two hours or more. Sundays are
spent washing clothes in the local river and then ironing, once the clothes
are dry.
Her husband rarely appreciates all this hard work or listens to her
suggestions. He doesn't mind cutting down the trees or burning the forest
underbush so that she can prepare the land for planting, but he does little
more. Occasionally he takes the children the river to wash themselves, and he
may do a little hunting and fishing. But much of his day is spent talking
with other menfolk of the village at the Bantabas.

 If the husband can afford it, after a few years, he will bring home a new,
younger wife, who will become the centre of his affection. His first wife,
however, will still be expected to keep working always until her health fails
or she dies.

SO, we asked ourselves: when does the woman has time for herself, her own
development, her growth etc......? The answer is obviously no time at all.
But, what has changed in our generation?

Regards,

Ndey Jobarteh & Awa Sey

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