OPINION
Prose:- Hee! Haa! Tupuch!-Lost Cause of Jahatu Economics
By Timbuktu



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September 19, 2005
Ok! Ok! we are celebrating the win. Our under 17 Boys are so good at soccer
that I could not reach out for this "agile" keyboard. Ok! Our sixth senses
are once again saying hi to all and sundry under the blue sky of this
beautiful world.

Our googles are focussing on The Gambia our home land. In this land we have
a Doctor on philosophy and "Jahatu" economics helping us grow. He has
succeeded in envisaging food self sufficiency, total electrification of The
Gambia our homeland, we strive work and pray! He has succeeded publishing a
vision 2020. One of the world's wildest dreams! What a visionary! Jammeh!
Jeelanka waaye! Where are we now? How about the eyes that see through the
future from this visionary's face?

Are they so good? Chuum Waaye! The Gambia is fully electrified because one
Kotu generator was transfered to Kanilai where electricity supply is 24
hours round the clock! Why not? Yes Kanilai is The Gambia and Gambia is
Kanilai under Jeelanka.Indeed The Gambia of Yaya has been electrified.Our
Gambia is yet to be but his is so bright.

Food self sufficiency "deh"! Yes food is sufficient in his Gambia because in
that very Gambia of Yaya, a bag of rice costs D250.00.In our Gambia a bag of
rice costs D700-D800.Why not? The president should not! buy rice at the same
rate compared to us the "doobaas"? Because? He is the "Seigneur
Presidente!!" "Buur Lah deh!" "Mansah baa lemu deh!"

Lest we forget revisiting the archives that were stored on our historical
slates. Once upon time...Ooops! Wolof Njie said..." Ley bone Lupen Amonn
naffi daan na amm!" Camon Timbuktu stop it! Start the story and stop the
jokes! Ok....Once upon a time...

"A great thinker and a great economist in a small country called DIH
GAMMBIYA, was teaching his pupils lessons on economics under the steaming
sun of Savannah land. Lesson one was on "Jahatu", "kilo-Yapa-yah",
"netettou", "salaat" and other condiments. Oh no... I have forgotten "Yate"
Sorry "Ndoomaar" Sorry. I did not mean to offend you because you make our
"benachin" taste so spicy and palatable! Ok lets go now...

Doctor! Thank you Sir! We were able to learn a lot.Ranging from the specific
to the general.You taught us about getting garden products from the Zoo in
your Gambia.You taught about arresting butchers then force them to reduce
prices. You taught us how to fight against Cheleram's expensive grains. You
showed how to order. YDE ordered(hijacked) a ship load of very bad rice
which was abandoned in the sea for days because its cargo was bad rice from
Jakarta. Sir you taught us how to accept the rice that was rejected by
Bissau. You did wonders Sir!

Wonders because you helped Gambians swallow more warms. You taught us how to
unload the consignment with Baba Joba Juba! Oooops! where is Babs? Oh yeah I
forgot he is in "Keur Ma Ndumbeh" Chei Baba! Why did you offend the
professor "you also"? Why?

Sir sorry for cutting your lengthy eulogy short. Ok lets go on... You taught
us how to spread the grains that the "shortees" send in as APRC rice? Was
this rice for Gambians or APRC Sir? Ooops! Sir this lesson was not
understood by Suma Jobe and other local chiefs. "Param!" they were arrested
and detained for stealing the President's rice. Yes the rice that "Seigneur
Peresidente" gave us. Did he buy it? I think he received gifts from the
"shortees". Is it the president's rice? Yes why not? "Maneh waajih Buur lah
deh!" "Aseh bra dis man nah lidah maye!" Oh sure! we recognise that, he is a
ruler that rules on souls not sheets.

Sir once again lets remind your pupils that you are doing a good job. You
taught us how to work at the milling machine in Kaur. The bags we saw bore
these words.. "MADE IN GAMBIA". Sir where are the bags? "Look! Timbuktu you
betta shat ap! I hate your writings, you stupid traitor" Sir am I one?

"You Timbuktu of course you are. Where you not here?" Ok Sir how about
yourself? Where you not President Jawara's guard? didn't you topple the poor
old man Sir?"

Hmmm... Timbuktu "Bilai Wolai Suma la jaapey!!!" Sir yes that's true..."Soma
Jaapey?!" Oh Sir how about "Mann Tamit suma la jaapey?!" "Sir Yallah Munna
lu raw lolu deh!" Sir God can do so right? Or you do not need His approval
here? Well Sir remember the might of the Paharaons!

Sir please let's stop the ping-pong I want to sing your eulogy please....
You taught us how to explain the dreams of Nostradamus behind close doors.
Sir people do not know but you are a "Woliyu"....Doctor (smiles
back)..."Ohou! Yaa ko wah deh". "You said so not me deh"

Alright Sir you taught us how to quarrel on the internet too. You taught us
how to use whips during rallies too. Sir you also taught us how to force
smiles on our faces even if the criticisms from Halifa and Hamat are
striking on the nerves of your failing body. Sir you also taught us how to
use that anger at night to eliminate those who want to stop you from eating
roasted mutton.

This man is real a teacher. He teaches and then bleaches the books! Everyday
the class sees a new lesson. Everyday the class sees new plans and new
lessons on evil.

These lessons on evil are usually taught when devils are around, to inspeact
his performance. School Inspectorate Unit! "Manneh Jemus Balaalal Nyu
waaye!" We cannot see "Jahatu" or "Kilo-yapaa-yahh" economics anywhere in
this big old encyclopedia? When shall we send an excerpt of your lessons to
Yellitenda Ferry terminal?



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