Tee,

I'm praying for wisdom and direction, which are promised in God's Word for 
you as you walk with Him and ask.  I can emphasize with you about emotional 
trauma, as I have experienced obsessive compulsive disorder and anxiety 
relating to my spiritual well-being, not realizing what was happening with 
me.  Jesus feels your pain.  I also believe that He is able to help you, 
even to want to trust Him, and to take care of the cold turkey withdrawals 
too, as He continues to show you The Truth that's setting you free.

Sharon