Hi all, this is just a message detailing some of the things we are dealing
with just now.
Perhaps you can relate.
First I seem to have issues with children around the age of 3.
What I am seeing is a lot of just bad behavior which when I bring it to the
attention of their parents or care takers they try to put off as my problem.
I personally think that people should take responsability for their kids and
try to teach them propper behavior but maybe it's just more dificult at that
age?  Still, when Katherine bit one of these children we called and
opologised and we really felt bad about it and slipped the kid a candy bar
next time we saw him.
Both of these kids are from families which hand off the child care to the
women and the women just kind of let them go and consider it break time when
they visit someone else's house with the kid.  One thing that happened was
when Katherine was very little and I was very protective of her, this kid
came up and wanted to play while I was giving Kate a bottle.
I told him, I can't play right now, I've got the baby.
Well the kid took a punch at me after this and I grabbed his hand to keep
him from possibly hurting the baby.
He ran crying to his mom who then came and started attacking me and I set
her strait very quickly and very loudly and told her that she should keep an
eye on her kid and especially teach him not to behave that way around very
young babies.
I also pointed out that this perticular baby's care taker could not see what
the kid was doing and just heard him lunge.
I was looking forward to talking to this woman's husband about the situation
but she claims she did not tell him because he would come after me.
hahahahahah
In other words the question of why wasn't she being responsible for her kid
would come up and she would have to deal with this wih her husband.
It's never been mentioned again by them but she is very responsible for her
kid anytime we are around now.
Ok, that one is Terri's aunt and cousin.
The second situation and one which is going on right now is with my mom and
my little neice who she cares for.
I have had to say something about the neice's behavior in my house and
toward me as well and my mom responds with either it's some problem I
personally am having or that the girl acts this way with all men.
Personally I think that the girl is not taught honor for men.
Recently I asked that my mom not bring the girl around as much when she came
to visit and her response to this was just to stop coming at all.
When I asked why the girl could not go to visit with her parents while my
mom visits us and the baby I received no answer.
My mom has a history of trying to manipulate to get her way.  I think the
tirm is contencious behavior.
Perhaps she sees my trying to get a handle on the situation as manipulation
but really I am just trying to keep my house strait and get the honor I
deserve.
I do not think that these children are seeing my disability as a weakness,
rather that it is their input about men.
Perhaps they consider men play toys for them or just not equal to the women
in their lives.
What do you folks think?
I am trying to handle the current situation as propperly as I can and we
will miss seeing the neice if she stops coming all together but it will not
be the end of our world.  I do wish that my mom and I could comunicate about
this better though.My wife and then my child come first and the rest of the
world is somewhere else down the line.  This is a relatively new way of
looking at things for me as I was not raised to understand things this way
but in the last few years we have finally put our household on the right
path and others outside our house don't quite get it yet.
Perhaps they never will and certainly it should not matter but for when we
have to deal with these people every once in a while.
When you are on the outside looking in you can kind of figure out why people
are the way they are but you can't change them to suit your own or even
their own needs.
It's frustrating.
Well enough for now.

Matt
Parents should not need their children, they should love their children.
Children need their parents.