Kathy,

Yes, the situation is pretty much the same here in Colorado.   Parents who
get physical in disciplining or controlling a teen risk being charged
themselves.  Not right, I know, but it's the way the laws are.  Considering
this flawed system, you did all the right things in the best way you knew
how.  Brad, in an ideal world, I could see your point.

JulieMelton
visit me at
www.heart-and-music.com
Keep smiling!


----- Original Message -----
From: "Kathy Due Bois" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Saturday, January 31, 2004 9:33 AM
Subject: Re: We had the police at our house!


> Hey Brad,
> No, Chris was in the room with us and threatened to continue smashing up
> the house if he didn't get his cards back.  We called the police because
> it really was the logical next step.  Priscilla, herself, told us that we
> did the right thing.  Now, she has pretty much assured me that I don't
> have to worry about damage to my family by human services because Chris's
> actions are on record.  He is the threat to us, not the other way around
> and that is documented.  We needed that for our family's protection.
>
> Also, yes, we have been wanting Chris  to help with repares for a long
> time, but he hasn't gotten a job to pay for damages.  Now, the judge will
> back us up.  I know that this makes us sound weak, but we live in a state
> in which kids have a lot of power and, unfortunately, you just can't do
> what a parent should do, at times, you have to do things the right way.
> It's horrible being limited like this, but it's the way it is.  Perhaps
> Julie can help explain it better, but maybe parenting isn't as
> constricted in Colorado.  I don't know.  In our favor too is the fact
> that we have Chris in counseling.  This shows the state that we are
> taking this situation seriously even if he does not.
>
> Before Chris came home yesterday I prayed  that whatever foothold that
> the devil was hoping to gain by getting into our household through those
> cards would be bound up by Christ and that instead, this would be an
> opportunity for his glory.
>
> You said that you couldn't understand Chris moving so quickly from
> wanting to destroy our house to wanting a hug.  The actual time frame
> from beginning to end was around four hours.  You got the Readers Digest
> version, believe me, but you have to remember that in the middle of it,
> he had to talk to the police, priscilla and he realized that his little
> temper  tantrum wasn't going to get him what he wanted, it was just going
> to get him removed. LIke the policeman said, and we agree, "Chris isn't
> stupid."  Besides, if you think of Chris as immature, you've seen kids go
> from a full blown tantrum to wanting a hug haven't you?  It's the same
> thing.  He's sixteen in age, but not in emotions, or maybe he is, I don't
> know.  I was never a sixteen year old boy.
>
> Anyway, from everybody that is in the know and in the business, we've
> been assured that we're on the right path.  Sorry if my story of last
> night's events have left you more confused than ever.  If I can continue
> to clear it up further I'm certainly willing to try.
> Thanks for caring,
> Kathy
>
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