I wish it worked like that for me. I surely pray over my past and
give it to god each time but memories still smart and still come back
to haunt me.
Doris
At 09:54 PM 8/6/2013 -0600, you wrote:
>Rhonda,
>
>As you probably recall, my dad died unexpectedly when I was 11 years
>of age. I never had any problems with my dad and his Christian
>testimony, his preaching, his skill in Biblical studies, and his
>strong desire to win people to Christ anywhere and everywhere, made
>him like God to me. Then he died. It was like God died I realized
>through prayer in these last few years. Anniversaries, birthdays,
>and repetitive memories which don't feel exactly right, or feel
>totally wrong, all are triggers of lies likely implanted by the
>Enemy at that time. To this very day, it isn't uncommon for me to
>be healed in an area directly, or indirectly, related to my dad or
>my blindness, which occurred exactly one year later to the day of my
>dad's death. Try and tell me the Enemy does not look for
>opportunities to plant his lies in our minds and emotions. A song
>or the scent of nearly anything are strong triggers that can also
>bring these memories, and if not the memories, the emotions of the
>implanted lies themselves, to the surface of our thoughts. It is
>like the little boy whose father always called him dumb. Often,
>that little boy stops growing inside at that moment and 40 or 50
>years later, it is as painful then as it was at the
>beginning. Fortunately God can, and will, expose the lie through
>prayer, and healed the damaged emotions related to the lie. Then He
>will speak His truth and that pain will never come back again. The
>memory will but when it does, it will be painless and Jesus will be
>standing there in the memory event with you every time.
>
>Phil.
>
>
>
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: <mailto:[log in to unmask]>Rhonda Partain
>To: <mailto:[log in to unmask]>[log in to unmask]
>Sent: Tuesday, August 06, 2013 7:13 PM
>Subject: Re: My life now as a Christian
>
>I know how that works, feeling the change in air pressure, and
>noting the difference in sound. They were amazed at guide dog school
>when I'd point to the left and ask what was over there?
>
>I don't think I've been afraid of God, I just wasn't sure he
>approved of me. I used to feel as though there was somewhere a
>master list of what one should and should not do; I of course
>couldn't keep all of the shoulds, and often did the shouldn't's.
>Perfection was hard to do. But, one day a clear thought managed to
>enter my mind "Who said you had to be perffect,?" Who indeed, was it
>God, no, who then, me, my Mother?
>
>So, if God didn't say it, then that meant I was "free" not to be
>perfect. God loved me because I was His, not forwhat I'd done, what
>I was doing, or even what I could do one day. Guess I'd never been
>valued for who I belonged to before!
>
>Prayer used to seem so borring to me; especially if folks gathered
>together to pray, the same words and phrases said by different
>people. I started just talking to God, remarking on how I felt, what
>I was thinking, and what was going on around me. I'd say things like,
>
>Lord, you know I want to trust you. Problem is,I've trusted people
>in the past, I've shared confidences, shared dreams, and had those
>confidences broken. I've been hurt by the very ones who claimed to
>love me the very most. Trust doesn't come naturally to me, if there
>was a dictionary of my life and all I've experienced beside the
>worrd trust it would say DON'T. So, I need you to help me rewrite my
>dictionary, show me what trust is, real trust.
>
>
>
>I used to feel awful because there were days when I didn't read the
>Bible, days when I only read one verse or two. But every day I still
>talked prayed, God doesn't love me like my Mother only when, I behave.
>
>He doesn't say like she did "sorry isn't good enough" His love is
>different.So it's around 50 years old, I'll be 50 in January, is
>that the reason for all this reflection?
>
>
>
>Thanks for sharing.
>
>
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