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Fellow celiacs,
    I realize this response is overdue, but I had so many responses that it
was a little overwhelming.  I basically said that I had given in to the
temptation and had eaten quite a bit of gluten over a couple of days and
wondered if any one struggled and gave in, or was it just me.  I think I
posted this to you all to get my hand slapped and help me get back on track.
I needed to be reminded of the consequences of gluten bingeing.
    For some of you who get so sick after eating gluten, you aren't as
tempted to give in.  This is understandable and to me even desirable.  Before
I was diagnosed and at the beginning, I was getting so sick from gluten, I
had checked into the emergency room many times because I could not stop
throwing up for days and was weak and dehydrated.  Even when I started going
gluten free, when I accidentally ingested gluten I got the same reaction - I
was a mess.  About 2 years ago, I totally gave in and under stress I snapped
and ate a lot of gluten and the most I got outwardly was some cramps and
tiredness/crankiness.  I found that once I had "broken the spell" and gave
in, it was much easier to do it again.  About 1 year later, I did it again
and now about a year later I have done it again.  I don't know that I care
for this pattern I've started with myself.  I'm very aware of the damage I'm
doing that is unseen in my intestines.  I believe that my intestines have
healed, which is why gluten doesn't effect them the way it used to.  I do
have horrible mood swings and I get depressed and angry and I'm extremely
exhausted for weeks afterwards.  Knowing all this, I wondered where others
were in the whole scheme of it all.
    I guess I am surprised at the number of you who have binged.  Some of you
said you had eaten gluten and not long afterwards, Dr said all looked fine
inside.  Many told me not to beat myself up, move on and start over with no
more gluten.  This is true and good advice, what's done is done.  I really
want to warn those who have not given in and have stayed gluten free - Don't
give in even once!  It made it easier to give in again and now again.  It's
not worth it.  I really wish I could say that I have been truly as gluten
free as possible these past 6 years and I can't.  Many said that the food
doesn't taste as good as they thought it would.  One person said to flush
your body out by drinking only water for a week, eat plain rice in addition
to any other meal for the next week too, and eat lots of bananas.
    Wow, I must say there were such diversified responses as to the severity
of eating gluten, it makes me realize that this is a field that is totally
unresearched to any serious extent.  Most importantly I think, is the problem
that it comes down to what one person "thinks is true" over another's
"opinions" instead of us having scientific research to back up some of these
"opinions".  (You know, Stanford Univ. is running a test of some sort and
doing some research and was looking for volunteers, I hope many responded.)
Some people said they couldn't believe a couple slip-ups means cancer and
others said it's not like you're going to die from eating gluten.  Some even
said their bingeing was worth it.  I might even be tempted to feel this way
if I hadn't of got this email from Lillian Horn:
        Let me tell you what you have done, you reopened your self to lymphoma
    so now for the next eight yrs you can worry about that when you only had
    two yrs left. how would you like to get so ill that you can't ever eat
    or drink ever again and how would you like to be in the end stages of
    celiac disease, there is one so don't think there isn't cause this is
    where I am and you just ran the risk of kidney failure cause if you get
    an uncontrollable attack of diarrhea the kidneys shut down.
    Lil

    Many did remind me of the cancer involved in eating gluten: 20-200%
greater risk. Not only cancer, but hypothyroiditis, fibromyalgia, DH and many
other diseases, some being deadly.  I already am at an 80% chance of breast
cancer, so I really don't want the stakes any higher with colon, intestinal,
bowel, stomach, and other cancers.  I really thank you all for bringing me
back to reality.  It's not just a "yeah!  I ate gluten and didn't get sick...
maybe I'll do this every year or so.."  It's a chance to make wise decisions
now that will greatly affect my future, and in light of my husband and 6 yr.
old son, I think I'll ask God every morning to help me have the proper
self-control to do what's right for me and thus my family.
    Some practical advice I received was to invest in some of the great
gluten-free products out there.  I love Food For Life's White Rice Bread and
will buy that and gluten free pasta, but I just don't have the money to buy
expensive cake mixes, bagels, pastries, and such.  But now, I think I'll find
a way to make ends meet.  If I had some of these products, I wouldn't be so
tempted to break down.  I will actually read the ads put on at the beginning
of each month and start looking through them.  I do hesitate because I once
bought a bag of pancake mix from a pretty well-known GF company and it was
the most disgusting stuff I'd ever had.  A friend bought me a bag of pancake
mix just a different brand and company and it was unbelievably good!  I don't
have money to try all the products listed from these companies only to find
out which one's disgusting and which one's good...  Maybe if someone has a
favorite item they buy and would share with me, I would appriciate it and
will post a list of favorites back to the list.
    Thanks for listening to this long email and thank you to each one who
responded to me.  And I will close with a thought from Jax Peters Lowell,
author of Against the Grain, who responded saying the trick is to see the
diet as a challenge, not as a sentence.  Thanks!
    Linda Sowry  :o)
    Pensacola, Florida  USA

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