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Got this from another mailing list but just seemed hysterically appropriate
for this list!

> Top 10 List of Bread Statistics
>
> 1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
>
> 2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming
> households score below average on standardized tests.
>
> 3. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been
> proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to
> suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than
> that in one month!
>
> 4. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
>
> 5. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of
> bread and given only water begged for bread after as little as two days.
>
> 6. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to
> "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even
> cold cuts.
>
> 7. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in
> the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years;
> infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died
> in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and
> influenza ravaged whole nations.
>
> 8. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within
> 24 hours of eating bread.
>
> 9. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit!
> That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
>
> 10. Many bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish
> between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical
> babbling.