lol! ken!

 
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----- Original Message ----
From: ken barber <[log in to unmask]>
To: [log in to unmask]
Sent: Wednesday, January 9, 2008 10:49:13 AM
Subject: a few jokes

Engineer's Glass 

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the
pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer,
the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. 



**************************************************


Balance 

God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the
archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day. He
inquired of God. "Where have you been?" God sighed a
deep sigh of satisfaction, and proudly pointed
downwards through the clouds, "Look, Michael. Look
what I've made." 

Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and said, "What is
it?" 

"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put Life on
it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a
great place of balance." 

"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. 

God explained, pointing to different parts of earth.
"For example, northern Europe will be a place of great
opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going
to be poor. Over there I've placed a continent of
white people, and over there is a continent of black
people. Balance in all things," 

God continued pointing to different countries. "This
one will be extremely hot, while this one will be very
cold and covered in ice." 

The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed
to a land area and said, "What's that one?" 

"Ah," said God "That's Washington State, the most
glorious place on earth. There are beautiful
mountains, rivers and streams, lakes, forests, hills,
plains, and coulees. The people from Washington State
are going to be handsome, modest, intelligent, and
humorous, and they are going to be found traveling the
world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking,
high achieving, and they will be known throughout the
world as diplomats, and carriers of peace." 

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then
proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there
would be balance." 

God smiled, "There is another Washington...wait until
you see the idiots I put there." 

***************************************************


Cop's Toilet 

Did you hear that someone broke into our local police
station and stole the toilet? 

Right now the cops have nothing to go on. 





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