Please spare me the pity and the bleeding heart, Joanne.  Parents like
you are the problem.  Just because your kid isn't perfect, you feel that
everything and everyone, including your kid, must bend over backwards to
meet your own little ego trip.  Outlooks like that is how Nazi medical
experimentation wields its hoary heads.  Naturally, all Nazis were
able-bodied and "superior".  Everybody else in the Reich did not meet
standards.

As for Alex's medical problems, he should get interventions.  But, that
not-being-equal-with-peers crap has got to go.  Guess what?  He may NEVER
be equal with his peers!!  So what?  Is that what you really want for him,
a lifetime of always feeling like he doesn't quite measure up?  I can
tell you that is a horribly destructive way to think and to be.  I did 27
of my 33 years of that and won't do it again.  Do you really want your kid
to feel that bad about himself and struggle with a major inferiority
complex for life?  Think very carefully. This is YOUR son.

Matt

On Fri, 9 Nov 2001, jd wrote:

> Oh please give me a break.Do I want to "fix" Alex?
> Heck no, he is a terrific little guy in his own right.
> Do I want to lessen his spasticity? You bet I do as
> much as possible. Is that not accepting his
> disability? Not at all. As things stand today he'll
> have CP for the rest of his hopefully very long life.
> His CP affects his GI system. The spasms of the
> digestive muscles when he was an infant was such that
> he vomited every meal. Should I have accepted that
> spasticity and watch him waste away and refuse to do
> the fundoplication and have the feeding tube placed.
> Should I have just accepted the spasticity and watch
> him waste away( he** he almost did, he was all of 16
> pounds when they did the surgery at 18mo) What I don't
> accept is the notion that since he has brain damage he
> isn't worth the treatment.
> Should I have accepted those spastic little arms and
> hands that got stuck close to his torso and not enroll
> him in intesive PT. Heck no or I would have missed
> that very first hug he was able to give me all by
> himself when he was  2 1/2. What I won't accept is
> that because he has CP he isn't worth the money for PT
> to the insurance companies. Should I have accept those
> spastic little legs and feet that kept pulling him
> over and never enabled him to use his hands. Should I
> accept the spasticity that prevented him from walking
> and joining his classmates. It really is hard to be on
> an equal level with your peers when your view of your
> classmates shoes because spasticity keeps you from
> achieving anything but an ants view. Or should I have
> done the research and soul searching and allowing the
> SDR surgery that did lessen his spasticity so he can
> now use a walker and a wc independantly. I will not
> accept however denying him a chance to stand proud
> with his friends. He will always have spastic quad CP
> but your darn tooting I intend to enable him as much
> as possible.
> Joanne
>
>
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