Trisha,
    It seems to me that there are several things which you need to think
about and explore very carefully when trying to help this child.By allowing
her to live with you without any legal paperwork establishing your authority
to make decisions for or about her you are leaving yourself in a very
vulnerable position.  For example, in your current circumstances, if she
were to become ill and require hospitalization or surgery you would be
unable to provide legal consent.  As unpleasant as it may seem to you, your
best options may be to work within the system.  For example, 1, have you
explored the possibility of helping her secure emancipated minor status,
which would allow her to make legal decisions for herself despite her youth.
2, have you considered applying to become a legitimate foster parent
yourself (which doesn't guarantee that you would be allowed to keep her, but
at least opens up the possibility) 3,if you cannot keep her, does she have
any relatives living in Fairfax County with whom she might be able to stay
(I know this isn't what either of you want , but it might be her best option
is the goal is to provide her with a stable environment and the opportunity
to return to school.) I could go on and on discussing various possibilities
and problems but my advice can really be summed up in one sentence.  UNLESS
YOU WANT TO CREATE A TREMENDOUS AMOUNT OF DIFFICULTY FOR YOURSELF, CONSULT A
CUSTODY LAWYER IMMEDIATELY AT LEAST CONSULT A TRAINED MENTAL HEALTH
PROFESSIONAL ABOUT THE DANGERS OF RESCUE FANTASIES.
Susan
PS. With respect to your concerns that the information contained in your
post be kept confidential, you do realize that the C-Palsy archives are open
to anyone who accesses the St. Johns list serve web site don't you? (At
least that's how I remember it being left the last time the issue came up.)
----- Original Message -----
From: "Trisha Cummings" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, April 18, 2002 1:06 PM
Subject: Tossing this out to your for ideas


> Greetings All,
>
>     I am frustrated to tears on this issue and could use some input - if
> anyone has any ideas or experiences.
>
> The background
> \
>            I am currently giving a home to an "abandoned"/"Runaway" child.
> This is the story. This needs to be kept confidential. She is 15 now and
> will be 16 in June. As of Wednesday 4/10 - I have her at my house - she
has
> her own furnished room and bathroom.
>
>            She  was living with her mother and stepfather. Her mother
> decided to divorce the stepfather and move to France. She left around
> Thanksgiving - pulling the chil  out of school and  taking her with her.
> They have lived in Paris - in one room for the last 4.5 months - the child
> has been babysitting to keep them afloat - The mother doesn't have a job.
> The child did not go to school while she was in France. Actually, the
child
> told me France has a 3 month visitors visa - so she  there where  there
> illegally - The stepfather brought the child back to the States. The
mother
> refuses to come back. The stepfather doesn't however want the child living
> with him. So she is living with us - we want her. It seems her mother is
> willing to sign over custody to me  As I understand it - the child father
> has relinquished all rights to the child. It maybe as simple as the mother
> signing a custody transfer form. I don't know - would need to talk to a
> lawyer about this. I am trying to keep this quiet as I don't want Fairfax
> County to come and put her in foster care.
>
>       Additional History about Athe child - from the best of my knowledge.
> The child's mother abandoned her at birth and was raised by her father - a
> drug addict - she lived in filth and squalor sharing the house with wild
> animals and caring for herself. She called Child Protect Services herself
to
> be taken away from him. She was placed with the grandmother - the father
> threatened them and followed thru with the threats - at this point the
> mother got custody of her about 4 years ago  and moved her up here.
>
>    I would like to the child back in school - as she now missed the 10th
> grade and she was an honor roll student. I can't do this without having
> custody.
>
> Here is where we are today!!!
>
>         Fairfax County doesn't allow temporary guardianship - so I must
> apply for custody of the child - in order to have custody - I need written
> premission from her plus 3 garunteed copies of her custody papers ( mother
> is France so takes time to get papers back and forth). If her father needs
> to be contacted then I need to place an ad in the paper and we need to
wait
> 72 days for him to answer. Then and only then can I have some temporary
> custody papers for the child, and then at a future date we go to court for
a
> custody hearing. By then school will be over for the year. Also even after
I
> have custody of the child - Fairfax county will charge me 8,400 to put her
> school - as I am not the mother even tho I will have custody - unless I
can
> prove hardship - and her mother being in France is not considered a
hardship
> - and the has choice of living in France illegally with her mother and not
> going to school - or living here with me and going to school - sounds like
> hardship to me. In the mean time the the child can't go to school - surely
> there must be someway to get her school.
>
>  She wants to live with us and go back school and be with her friends.
>
>    Ideas would be great - prayers, or good thoughts - would be really nice
> also.
>
>                                     Brightest Blessings - Trisha
>