On Tuesday 24 Sep 2002 9:36 pm, Cleveland, Kyle E. wrote:
>  That's why (I hate to admit) I was really reticent about having
> kids when I was well into my '30s.  Laura is younger than me and it
> was her first marriage, so, naturally, kids were in her game plan.
> Don't get me wrong.  I love the two youngest to death and I'm
> thrilled they are here.  It's just that I feel like they are
> missing out on a lot of stuff because I simply can't do what the
> other dads are doing.  Our neighborhood is kind of an anomaly too:
> there are virtually no single-parent families.  The place is about
> as "whitebread" as you can get.
>
> I think the issue is going to be harder with the boy.  I can get
> his sister interested in sitting down for an afternoon while we tie
> flies.  She's into the art and science of the whole thing:
> entomology, colors, techniques, etc. That's cool because we can
> talk and laugh and just sort of...click!
>
> Alex, on the other hand, is a doer, not a thinker.  His idea of
> fishing, for example, is five minutes of actual "hook in the water"
> time, followed by a few hours playing "pirates" by climbing the
> trees overhanging the lake.  He doesn't hide his disappointment,
> either, when I tell him that Dad can't climb the trees like he can.
>  He even said, the other day, "Matt's dad likes him better than you
> like me because his dad gets in the (tree) fort with us, and you
> won't!"  He doesn't buy the argument that I'm just not capable of
> it.  It doesn't make sense for him because he sees me in the old
> photo albums just "doing it all".

> Like I said, it's something I thing young CPers should think about
> when they consider having children.  It may not be Politically
> Correct, but when the rubber meets the road you could really be
> cheating your kids.

A bit harsh. When the kids were young, I made it clear that it wasn't
in my "job description" to be a nanny to them. If they wanted to do
something "dangerous" (like climbing a tree) I wasn't going to help
them or hover around below to catch them, they had to rely on their
own physical abilities - not mine. My kids weren't the problem (they
knew the rules) it was other peoples - the "launchers", who just let
go of a branch when they get stuck, on the assumption they will
always get "saved"!!!

Cheers

Deri
> Dammit!  Got an alarm.
>
> -K
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BG Greer, PhD [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
> Sent: Tuesday, September 24, 2002 4:15 PM
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: feeling guilty or angry was : Missing Children
>
> In a message dated 9/24/02 3:01:37 PM, [log in to unmask]
writes:
> >Bobby, what were your physical capabilities like when your kids
> > were wee ones?
> >
> >-Kyle
>
> They were are far cry better than now! They were teens when I had
> by-pass in '83 and started slowing down. Before that I was hell on
> wheels. My body now reminds me everyday!
>
> Bobby