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Subject:
From:
Betty Alfred <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
St. John's University Cerebral Palsy List
Date:
Fri, 10 Dec 1999 13:33:40 EST
Content-Type:
text/plain
Parts/Attachments:
text/plain (25 lines)
I hate to use the word "invalidate" because I had a friend who ran it into
the ground until I thought I never wanted to hear it again.  But this is why
it's so important not to invalidate someone's feelings about their
experiences.  Things that would have a negative impact on them might not have
the same impact on me and vice versa.

People do this all the time though.  I do it myself, I'm sure.  I ain't a
judgin'
Betty

In a message dated 12/10/1999 12:17:56 PM Eastern Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:

<< The textbooks on adjustment to disabling conditions say that the impact
 of a specific disability depends on its effect on what the individual with
 the disabilty values most. A small facial scar would not effect me, I
 already have some; but to a fashion model, it could be disastrous. Denise's
 gram, I take it, valued physical health and independence very much. Cancer
 did irreparable damage to these in her life and the result was detailed by
 Denise.I wrote a play with my best friend while he was dying of cancer and
 we joked about death as most "macho men" would do. I watched "Tuesday with
 Morrie" the other night and some of those scenes brought back some bad
 images of that phase of my life.
  >>

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