Joanne,

I want to thank you for your considerate and compassionate read on
growing up unloved an unwanted.  How to create and find love in all the
right ways and places endures as a primary human concern--not only for
people with disabilities.  Children especially are vulnerable to
violation, brutality, exploitation, neglect as many on this list know
all too well.

Your concern allows me to reflect on a painful personal experience.  Let
me be clear that my parents and family raised me wanted, loved and
nurtured.  They determined that I be given every opportunity to succeed.
The problems I encountered happened young.  To this day, with all of my
knowledge and finesse, I feel the rawness of not having, for a period in
hospital, a mother or father to sooth my crying in the night, to stay
with me when I wanted.  Even now the long ago experience colors my
encountering the adult issues of love, trust, and betrayal.

Another level for celebrating birthdays.  But I want you to know I
noted.  And I care very much, even though some Fools may think
otherwise.  I am always and ever blessed with true and wonderful
friends.

Thanks,

Steve M.







> >From: joanne <[log in to unmask]>
> >Reply-To: joanne <[log in to unmask]>
> >To: [log in to unmask]
> >Subject: Re: on a much more serious note an intereting article
> >Date: Wed, 28 Mar 2001 00:13:10 -0500
> >
> >Isn't it funny what different perspectives we have from reading the
very
> >same words. I really never thought it was really about euthesia at
all but
> >about being loved for ones self and not despised for ones
disabilities,
> >especially by those who should love and accept us the most. In her
writing
> >she says
> >"I have strong views on what my treatment should have been. My
parents were
> >told I would be a vegetable. if the doctors had really believed what
they
> >said, they should have made sure I died. To give me back to my
parents with
> >such a label was unfair both to them and to me. When my parents
rejected me
> >I should not have been institutionalized, I should have been offered
for
> >adoption. If no one had wanted me I should have been killed. "
> >I interpret that as saying adoption by people who could love her was
her
> >preferred choice and only a loveless life is not worth living.
> >She also says
> >"My disability does not make life unbearable. I could have had a
happy life
> >despite my disabilities if I had been loved"
> >This issue has often played on the preemie lists I belong to. Many
parents
> >rage that their child has disabilities and that they should have been
> >allowed to die because of that. Many of those children were taken off
life
> >support and no other heroic measures were taken and still lived and
the
> >parents are furious what it's done to THEIR lives.
> >----- Original Message -----
> >From: Cleveland, Kyle E. <[log in to unmask]>
> >To: <[log in to unmask]>
> >Sent: Tuesday, March 27, 2001 2:24 PM
> >Subject: Re: on a much more serious note an intereting article
> >
> >
> > > Something smells fishy in Denmark here.  Could it be a red
herring?  I'm
> > > with Deri.  This sounds too much like a promotional press release
for
> >the
> > > $16 book.  In her last sentence Ms. McDonald states, "I love the
life I
> >now
> > > lead, even though I'm severely disabled."  Seems to be waffling
then on
> >the
> > > euthenasia.  There is no salient point to her whining save for a
hook to
> >buy
> > > a book.
>
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