Well Said
Joyce
----- Original Message -----
From: "Trisha Cummings" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, May 11, 2000 11:24 AM
Subject: Re: [DateAbilities] GETTING TO KNOW YOU SURVEY FOR SINGLES
> Hi Joy,
>
> Thank you for the kind words!! I find that children and teens are
> intelligent thinking people (something some adults who functions from a
> reactionary gut level - could take lesson in....) and I treat them as
such.
> I never treated any topic as something my child was to young to know about
> but geared what she learned to her age. I believe the best defense is to
> give people good knowledge - not tell them something is bad and not to do
it
> - becasue that only makes it more attractive. I was flummoxed almost 7
years
> ago when they put Amber 15 year old step-sister on birth control pills. I
> registered my protest and was told to get real. I have emphasised with
Amber
> that is an adult activity - to be done with someone you love - that your
> body is not a toy, and you don't have to do everything when you first can.
I
> suggested she wait until she is 18 or 20 and has a serious relationship -
I
> could still off be base. I assume we will have to revisit this in the
future
> but for now - my little girl is happy being a little girl. Blessed Be!!! I
> was floored last year when her friend Nadia - who's mother has a large gap
> in morals and a very mouth without a sense of propriety - enlightened her
> kid as to BJ's - who promptly told my kid. When I ask who BJ was - Amber
was
> Mom - its a BlowJob - get real we use modern terms. Yeah Mom - Get Real!!!
> Let's face it - Hollywood leaves nothing to the imagination - I have
> stumbled across stuff on the Internet - I could have gone my entire life
> without seeing. As long as people make things bad and forbid them - other
> folks are going to sensationalize them. If you treat stuff as natural and
> normal and educate people they can make a rational decision when and where
> and whether or not they want to do something. If not, it becomes whispered
> conversation, and stuff to try. Its a tough subject to discuss - however
as
> far as I am concerned when you can physically reproduce its time to put
the
> cards on the table, so it doesn't happen.
>
> You are right - Amber has her own e-mail account. I do not monitor it.
I
> have given her age approapriate lessons the stuff she needs to know - and
> she knows how to handle most topics. She understood about gay when she was
> 8. Babies when she 4. She deals with well, she discusses stuff with her
> friends and then may double check something with me. Okay so once in a
Blue
> Moon - I would love to be off planet - for a question, it still gets an
> answer and the truth. People forget - children and teens are cognizant
> people all their lives - they don't suddenly become thinking adults at age
> 21 - if you don't have a thinking 6 year old - you won't have a thinking
18
> year old.
>
> I one read question here about some aid thing and looked it up -
becasue
> the questioner didn't answer me when I ask what it was. I looked it up OH
> MY!!! I was ........ Yes. I was........ wordless. I feel we taught people
> about sex and intimacy - there would be a lot fewer relationship problems.
> Something you spend 1% of your life doing shouldn't dictate your
> relationships. Each one of us that has kids - makes the choice of
> reproducing the same silly behavior that shackles us - or moving beyond
them
> and helping our kids thru understanding ourselves and growing.
>
> Brightest Blessings
> Trisha
>
>
> >Thanks for the compliment. It's nice to know that at least a few people
> >don't think that all teenagers are naive, self-centered, hooligans. As
> >for
> >the original post, I didn't have a problem with it. I think it would be
> >very hypocritical for any parent to. Part of giving your child their
> >own
> >e-mail account means trusting them to deal with subjects that might come
> up.
> If you don't think they can handle mature discussion, don't let them get
> e-mail that you don't read first. They're going to have to be exposed
> to
> the world at some point... it might as well be from a group of caring,
> experienced, adults. I didn't think Trisha was endorsing anal and oral
> sex,
> just relating some of the difficulties she'd had in the dating world.
> Isn't
> this list all about sharing experiences?
>
> ~Joy~
> [log in to unmask]
> http://www.geocities.com/joy0823
> "Forget regrets, or life is yours to miss." - Mimi in RENT
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Michael H. Collis" <[log in to unmask]>
> Sent: Monday, May 08, 2000 8:11 PM
> Subject: Re: [DateAbilities] GETTING TO KNOW YOU SURVEY FOR SINGLES
>
>
> > I have no qualms about the maturity of most
> > of the teenagers on this list. They seem more mature than I was at
> that
> > age... :)
> > M.
>
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