well kat you are certainly right about tact if nothing
else. 

--- "[log in to unmask]" <[log in to unmask]>
wrote:

> Thank you for the clarification, Kendall - having
> had no experience with
> IEP or Social Services, I didn't know what was
> involved.
> 
> I still say the SW needs to go back to school to
> learn tact, if nothing
> else.
> 
> Kat
> 
> Original Message:
> -----------------
> From: Kendall D. Corbett [log in to unmask]
> Date: Mon, 23 Jul 2007 13:06:01 -0600
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: C-PALSY Digest - 20 Jul 2007 to 22 Jul
> 2007 (#2007-136)
> 
> 
> Kat,
> 
> If It's an IEP issue, the parents have  the ultimate
> say in who is
> included on the IEP team.
> 
>  If the evaluation was ordered by Heidi's son's
> doctor, and the
> insurance is asking the social worker's opinion, I'd
> suggest an appeal
> of having the SW included at this point, or at the
> very least having a
> different social worker sit in on it.
> 
> Heidi never actually used the terminology for CP in
> this post, but it
> was something she was concerned about in her intro,
> and why she found
> the list.  What Heidi said in this instance was:
> 
> > She alluded last week that my sons delays may be
> due to my
> > "overcaring nature" and mothers sometimes are too
> concerned and hovering.
> > Made my blood boil but I said nothing.
> 
> On 7/23/07, [log in to unmask]
> <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> > OK, I'm scratching my head here because I don't
> recall anyone saying that
> > anyone is responsible for Heidi's son having CP or
> any other developmental
> > disabilities and if the social worker thinks so,
> then she ought to go back
> > to school.
> >
> > Now, if the SW thinks that Heidi's making too much
> of things that she sees
> > as normal, then the exam will prove her wrong if
> there is a developmental
> > disability.  Note that I'm careful in not using
> the term CP as there are a
> > lot of developmental disabilities out there and CP
> is just one of them.
> >
> > Ih my opinion, the best thing to do is to relax
> and let the doctors do
> > their exam.  Kendall, how can Heidi not have the
> SW there if she insists
> on
> > being present?
> >
> > Kat
> >
> > Original Message:
> > -----------------
> > From: Kendall D. Corbett [log in to unmask]
> > Date: Mon, 23 Jul 2007 11:14:27 -0600
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Subject: Re: C-PALSY Digest - 20 Jul 2007 to 22
> Jul 2007 (#2007-136)
> >
> >
> > Heidi,
> >
> > I'd suggest that you have the exam without the
> social worker present
> > at this point.  Let the PT and OT (and possibly a
> developmental
> > pediatrician/neurologist) rule out any
> physical/organic causes for
> > your sons delays first.  Then, if those are ruled
> out, talk with the
> > social worker, or another counselor, as it sounds
> like it will be
> > difficukt to build a good working relationship
> with this social
> > worker.  He/she may have the best intentions in
> the world for
> > mentioning possible psychological causes for his
> delays, but I'd think
> > ruling out other causes first is a good strategy.
> >
> > I'm not going to say whether G-d had anything to
> do with his delays,
> > as I don't know what your faith life is.  I'm
> definitely not a
> > Calvinist, so I'm sure your son wasn't
> pre-ordained to have the delays
> > that he has.  After I was born, and later after I
> had my stroke,
> > "friends" of my mother said that G-d was punishing
> her (or me) for
> > things that had happened in our past.  That was
> definitely BS.  I will
> > say that I learned things through my disabilities
> that have been
> > beneficial spiritually, whether that is in my
> faith, or just in how I
> > deal with those whose lives I touch, and whose
> lives touch mine.
> >
> > On 7/23/07, Tamar Raine <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
> > > Here's an idea. God is only an imaginary idea,
> like the tooth fairy,  it
> > is people that run the world. sometimes shit
> happens, and it's nobody's
> > fault!
> > >
> > > Heidi, that's a load of bs that it's your fault.
>  gopefully the exams
> > will prove that, so you can begin to get him some
> help.
> > >
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > Tamar Mag Raine
> > > [log in to unmask]
> > > http://www.zazzle.com/TamarMag*
> > > www.cafepress.com/tamarmag
> > > Lots of new art & designs ~ come and look!
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > ----- Original Message ----
> > > From: heidi tibollo <[log in to unmask]>
> > > To: [log in to unmask]
> > > Sent: Sunday, July 22, 2007 9:59:02 PM
> > > Subject: Re: C-PALSY Digest - 20 Jul 2007 to 22
> Jul 2007 (#2007-136)
> > >
> > >
> > > Hi all,
> > > We have an early intervention assessment this
> week with a PT and OT to
> > see if we qualify for help for our son with gross
> motor and possibly
> Speech
> > and gagging issues. My concern is that the social
> worker will be there
> > also. She alluded last week that my sons delays
> may be due to my
> > "overcaring nature" and mothers sometimes are too
> concerned and hovering.
> > Made my blood boil but I said nothing. Now I am
> concerned she may
> influence
> > the PT and OT. Do I say something at the onset of
> the evaluation? Say
> > something only if they say he doesn't meet the
> criteria? The social worker
> > thought I should be introducing more foods and
> found out I am an
> attachment
> > parent (co-sleeping and extended breastfeeding).
> My older son was very
> > allergic to all dairy and eggs so I haven't
> introduced them into my
> younger
> > son's diet yet and, hello,- he gaggs and doesn't
> seem to have any interest
> > in chewing. My husband feels that I am responsible
> for our sons delays
> "too
> > nurturing yet
> > >  not engaging enough"-
> > > his (and his mother's) explaination as to why my
> son has been globally
> > delayed with motor and intellectual milestones.
> What do I say to this- do
> I
> > want to be right, that my son does have some
> issues and prove my husband
> > wrong. I would be thrilled if I was the reason for
> all the delays yet
> > somehow I am hurt that he blames me. (to be fair
> he says he's not blaming
> > me just pointing out what he thinks) Very
> frustrating.
> > > Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
> 
=== message truncated ===



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