Mag,
Congrats on the dog! We've got Carhartt,n 80 lb Chowbrador (Chow/Lab cross)
who's going on 12 now. Lamby sounds like a sweetheart. How old is she?
Kendall
On Dec 2, 2009 11:43am, Tamar Raine <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> howdy kendall,
> Yep, it's hard to know when and what to tell people. and nothing is
> guaranteed to stay the same!
> well, in case everybody who isn't on facebook, want to know my news; I
> adopted a little dog! her namy is lamby because she's got a lot of
> poodle/labrador in her so has the soft curly hair. still working out how
> to clean up the poop but my helpers helping me w/it.
> Thanks,
> Tamar
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Tamar Mag Raine
> To see my newest articles:
> http://www.submityourarticle.com/articles/Tamar%20Mag-Raine-6019/
> [log in to unmask]
> http://www.zazzle.com/TamarMag*
> www.cafepress.com/tamarmag
> Retired Commissioner, MCPD
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> ________________________________
> From: Kendall D. Corbett [log in to unmask]>
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Sent: Wed, December 2, 2009 9:57:07 AM
> Subject: Fwd: FW: [HYCEPH-L] denial ie relationships
> Sorry for the cross post, but this topic came up on another list, and it
> seemed really pertinent herre too.
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: Hydrocephalus Info & Support [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
> Behalf Of Kendall David Corbett
> > Sent: Wednesday, December 02, 2009 10:27 AM
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Subject: Re: [HYCEPH-L] denial ie relationships
> > Christopher, Ingrid, Chris and StacyAnn,
> > After my reply to Stacy I went back and read the thread. Everything
> that Ingrid and Chris said is so true. My first serious relationship was
> with a girl who had Hodgkin's disease, a form of lymphatic cancer. After
> I found out that she had it, even though she was in remission, I broke
> off our relationship. Even though I was 15 at the time, I was as honest
> with her as I could be. I told Kay that I wasn't ready to get involved
> with someone who might die. My biggest mistake was trusting my own
> ability to research information on a disease/condition, which I'd started
> to do for hydro. I looked up Hodgkin's disease in my Dad's med school
> text books, which were 20 years out of date, and used that information to
> base my decision on. When I started asking for info on hydro, Dad had
> sent me to the hospital library, as he knew his texts were out of date.
> Kay was healthy at the time (1975), but I looked at those 1950's text
> books, that said survival rates were
> around 15% and panicked. I regret to this day doing that. Shortly
> afterwards, she moved about as far from Wyoming as you can get and stay
> in the US. I often thought about her, and tried to contact her to
> apologise. About 25 years ago, I ran into her, and we talked briefly. I
> wish I'd had the courage to talk to her then or get her phone number so
> we could have talked.
> > Fast forward another ten years (1995) to when Janet and I got together.
> Janet has CP, as I do, and so I was determined not to let our
> disabilities get in the way of our relationship. At 35, we both got
> around fairly well, but both of our physical capabilities have declined
> in the intervening years. I've gone from a manual wheelchair to a power
> chair, and Janet's in the process of transitioning to a chair. Our house
> is set up well for this but we both need help with ADL's (activities of
> daily living) that we didn't before. Things get tense from time to time
> when I can't help her with something I used to, or she can't help me in a
> similar situation. We're learning how to deal with that but it's a
> painful process (sometimes physically, as well as emotionally). When you
> do find someone to develop a relationship with, I hope that she is as
> patient with you as Janet is with me..
> > Kendall
> > 49 year old trilobite diagnosed in November 1960, shunted in April
> 1961, diagnosed with spastic diplegic cerebral palsy in 1963,
> intraoperative stroke during a shunt revision in 1977, resulting in left
> hemiplegia. Shunt free since 1978 (fenestrated cerebello-pontine angle
> cyst) - the "silver lining" to the stroke and an infection in 1977. I've
> worked in the disabilities field for the last 20 years, and have been
> married to Janet, IMHO, the most wonderful woman in the world, since 1997.
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: Hydrocephalus Info & Support [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
> Behalf Of Ingrid Exner
> > Sent: Wednesday, December 02, 2009 8:00 AM
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Subject: Re: [HYCEPH-L] denial ie relationships
> > Hi Christopher,
> > Back in university, I had a boyfriend who I was very compatible with.
> He was
> > fun loving, spontaneous, caring etc. We dated for some time and had
> great
> > times. Then, my shunt broke.
> > He was as supportive the best that he could be given his age, background
> > etc. But, the revision was complicated and I ended up with multiple
> > infections. It was hard on him; I was told by friends that he would go
> for
> > walks in the evening, cry, scream etc. His mother was a registered
> nurse and
> > knew more bad stories than good about hydrocephalus. Needless to say, we
> > broke up when I got better. And, I was bitter for a while (but it didn't
> > stop me from dating others.) It took a while to get over the bitterness
> and
> > for me to realize that it was probably the best thing that could have
> > happened to me. For a while, I still dated people who probably couldn't
> > accept me and the hydrocephalus- it is a big, complex and mysterious
> > package! And, in fact, the true test, I think is when the shunt fails
> and
> > must be revised (my current husband hasn't been through this.) I don't
> know
> > how he will react. What I ca say ad do know is that he accepts that I
> have
> > limitations and that this entity called hydrocephalus ca at times cause
> m
> > great distress. However, saying that, the hydrocephalus has made me the
> > sensitive person that I am. Had I not had the experiences that I have
> had, I
> > would not be the person that he currently is and wants to be with. So,
> how
> > can he deny that?
> > I hope some part of my rambling resonates. I do think that people have
> to be
> > accepting/ inquisitive and wanting to learn of the hydrocephalus if they
> > want to be accepting of us (especially for more romantic/ long term
> > relationships). Is it difficult when I am rejected because of the
> > hydrocephalus- absolutely and do I get bitter? Yes. But, I also think
> that
> > there is a time and purpose for everything. Not everyone is meant to
> fully
> > understand or get it, and that's okay too. These people may just be
> casual
> > friends- nothing more.
> > I hope this helps.
> > [PS: I may have also chewed out that person (unless her sole intent was
> to
> > reconnect to apologize) or atleast I would have made it really clear to
> her
> > the affect she had on me in the past and the need for acceptance moving
> > forward.)
> > Ingrid
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: Hydrocephalus Info & Support [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
> > Behalf Of Christopher Range
> > Sent: Tuesday, December 01, 2009 10:03 PM
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Subject: [HYCEPH-L] denial ie relationships
> > Has anyone ever encountered someone, be it, either someone they wanted
> > to be romantically involved with or, someone they were involved with,
> > that expressed fear about your health as, being a reason to either, end
> > a relationship, not get in a relationship or, as an excuse for a poor
> > reaction, when your health took a turn for the worse?
> > I know I am being ambiguous. But there is a reason.
> > Back in 1998, a year after my (ex)wife left(separated) me, she told me
> > that, she had wished for a long time, that my health problems would
> > 'just go away'. I found that to be egregiously ignorant on her part,
> > since she had all the info about my health, before we got
> > married(1992). When she told me that, that is when I finally decided
> > to divorce(2000) her. In 1995, I had a seizure in bed and, she just
> > stared at me.
> > Then, Today, I got an IM(Instant Message) request from a woman I had met
> > online back in 2001, via a Christian dating website. When I told her
> > back in 2001, about my health problems, she said right from the start,
> > that she couldn't deal with them. Today, I approved her, only for the
> > purpose of chewing her out. She accused me of lecturing her. I told
> > her, I had held the hurt in for a long time. I got off my chest, how
> > she hurt my feelings.
> > Christopher
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