Hard of Hearing 
A man is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife's going deaf." 

The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is." 

The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He doesn't hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he's standing just a few feet away from her. 

Finally, she answers, "For the eleventh time, I said we're having MEATLOAF!" 

Economics Professor 
An economics professor at school had a strict policy that the hourly examinations were to be completed at the bell and anyone who kept writing on their exam after the bell would take a zero on the exam. 

Well, one guy kept writing on his exam for a while after the bell and then confidently strode up to turn it in. The professor looked at him and said, "Don't bother to hand that paper in... you get a zero for continuing after the bell." 

The guy looked at him and said, "Professor, do you know who I am!" 

The professor replied, "No, and I don't care if your dad is president of the United States...you get a zero on this exam" 

The guy, with a enraged look on his face, shouted, "You mean you have no idea who I am?" 

The professor responded, "No, I've no idea who you think you are." 

With that, the guy said "Good!" plunged his exam into the middle of the stack of other student's exams, and did a hasty retreat from the examination room! 



      

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