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Subject:
From:
Betty Alfred <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
St. John's University Cerebral Palsy List
Date:
Sun, 13 Feb 2000 08:33:48 EST
Content-Type:
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In a message dated 02/12/2000 10:04:26 PM Eastern Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:

<< I just don't like being lumped with those who like to abuse the system and
 let everyone in the world feel sorry for them.
  >>
 I agree -- that bothers me too.  I guess I'm a little defensive since I
can't work now.  I keep reminding myself that I pushed it to the max until I
just couldn't go on, but that my work ethic hasn't changed.  I still do what
I am able to do.  Now it's just in different ways, and the things I do are
not as obvious to the casual observer.

It hurts to be excluded and misunderstood and I'm not going to pretend it
doesn't.  I can make choices about what to do with the hurt -- I mean whether
my response is going to be that of a mature adult or that of an undisciplined
child.  But I'm not going to pretend that I don't have a normal emotional
reaction when somebody hurts my feelings.

That's something that is often expected of us.  If somebody poops all over us
we're supposed to act like it's okay and it doesn't bother us.  There is no
reward in being patted on the head for smiling while you are being abused in
some way.  It seems to me that if we accommodate that expectation we're just
contributing to the problem.  We're really enabling society or an individual
person -- as the case may be -- to do more pooping.  And the next pooping may
be on someone else -- it ain't just about little old me.

I am reminded again of the title of Judge Judy's book, "Don't pee on my leg
and tell me it's raining."  Crude but effective, eh?

Betty

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