Hi everybody,
i got some sad news the other day. I had taken my dog to the vet because
her tumor had become so big. and my ex husband was just not able to afford
to do anything about it, (his words, difficult situation)  she is 14, and
has mammary (breast) cancer. My vet thinks she has between weeks and six
months to live. She said surgery would only give us several more months,
and would be extremely painful for Sugar to recover from because the
stomach area where it is, is very tight -- plus she thinks the tumor would
probably grow right back. So, I know I wouldn't want her to suffer from
surgery, so, we are going to let nature take its course, and when the time
comes, we will take her to the vet together to put her to sleep. I love my
little Suggie so much, I have gone to see her and take her for long walks
at least once a month since I left Tim. She has lived with him, but she was
my dog. I took her in and gave her a home when Tim had turned her away.I
ran down the stairs and across the street where the neighborhood kids were
playing with her. I called to her, I said, "here, puppy." and she ran to me
and licked my face.

She came to us when the first gulf war broke out, and she was shoved from a
car on our block and I was on the bed crying about the war and this little
puppy hopped up and began licking my face, and I said, "oh, you are such a
sweet doggie, I'm going to name you Sugar!"  Anyway, I trained her, fed
her, groomed her, played with her for the first seven years of her life. I
even stayed with Tim an extra year because I had made a promise to Sugar
that I'd never abandon her. but in the end, I had to leave for my own good,
and really, that's why I had to go on anti-depressants, because for the
first two months after I moved out, I cried myself to sleep every night
over the sweet doggie. I can only console myself by thinking what I'd come
to realize about six months ago, that she was beginning to slow down, but I
had the joy of her for 14  years. Of course at that time and recently, I
thought she had maybe one or two more years in her yet.

I'm angry that Tim couldn't convince his current wife to pay for a surgery
when the tumor was small and surgery would have been more promising.  I'm
tired of Tim's excuses and so glad I'm no longer his wife.




Tamar Magenta Raine
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Oakland Mayor's Commission on People with disabilities