I like those. hehehehe.
Brad
At 12/17/2003 on Wednesday, April Reisinger wrote:
>Subject: 7 Reasons Not To Mess With A Child
>
>A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it
>was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though
>it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl
>stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher
>reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically
>impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
>The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied,
>"Then you ask him".
>
>A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they
>were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
>As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the
>drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and
>said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or
>looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
>
>A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five
>and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father
>and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to
>treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (the
>oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill..."
>
>One day a little girl was sitting and watching her do the dishes at the
>kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of
>white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her
>mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her
>mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me
>cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about
>this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's
>hairs are white?"
>
>The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
>persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice
>it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say,'There's
>Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice
>at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead. "
>
>A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to
>make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the
>blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.."
>"Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in
>the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow
>shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
>
>The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school
>for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun
>made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is
>watching."Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table
>was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note,
>"Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
>
>It doesn't matter how many people you send this to, just remember if it made
>you laugh, your friends will laugh too!
>
>Love you all,
>April
>
>Somebody has significantly improved my life! It's a tough job, but there
>are some really tough people out there!
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