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http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/babylonbeyond/2010/01/muslim-world-polygamy-for-women-article-sparks-public-row.html
http://www.commongroundnews.org/article.php?id=27421&lan=en&sid=1&sp=0&isNew=1
On 05/05/10, Victor Narwortey <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
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> I'm not agaist polygamy in toto, I'm a hybrid of a very successful polygamous union and I love my other 2 mums and 15 brothers and sisters to death. But on the same token, I think the conditions that warrant polygamous marriages does not exist in the 21st century world we live in now. Gone are the days when your mutual funds, 4o1k, and stocks(wealth) are measured in the number of wives and offsprings you have. Those days are just gone.
> I also think the main character (mrs kaliati) in this argument seems to be a bed room bully to me. Her motives for having this law enacted might be to cover the torture session she put her husband through and she even went to the extent to prescribe a bedroom code of conduct for everyone. I don't know what is gonnhappened to those in polygamous relationships before this law is pass ? And is likely successive governments will repeal this law. So like I said
> before, it's just wrong to have legislation ban or promulgate something that common sense can solve.
> I rest my case.
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> On May 3, 2010, at 6:45 PM, Ann Marie Dawson <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]>> wrote:
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> > The problem Victor, is that you seem to have boiled the whole thing down to bedroom activities. By the way, from my observation of polygamous marriages, I have never come across one where the husband spends the same night with all his wives. I could be wrong but I think if that was the case, the practice would have died out long time ago for the same reasons for which you complain.
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> > Anyway, if you want to continue this conversation then you will have to send me a private email because I am one of those who complain when people over discuss things on the listserve.
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> > On Mon, May 3, 2010 at 9:12 AM, Victor Narwortey <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])">> wrote:
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> > > Can you share one of the complexities with us? I just don't know what will motivate a man to have an extra legs on the bed and an additional headache for a life time in putting up with two competing loves and attention from two wifes or more.
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> > > On May 3, 2010, at 9:04 AM, Ann Marie Dawson <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">> wrote:
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> > > > My brother, I know this may surprise you but I am not going to argue on the issue of polygamy at this time because I know that polygamy is a more complex issue than just having more than one wife.
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> > > > On Mon, May 3, 2010 at 8:56 AM, Victor Narwortey <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">> wrote:
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> > > > > Ha ha ha ! Are you suggesting she" wears the Pants" in the relationship? I'm just worried about the stoic defence of poligamy in Africa lately such that legislation is needed to ban or promogate it. Where has common sense gone too? If men in this hemisphere (USA ) could do with one wife, why cant our brothers and fathers on the continent do with one wife aswell? And I'm gonna asked again, do they have a higher libido than we do here or what? Poligamy, I think has outlived it's usefulness in this mordern era.
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> > > > > On May 3, 2010, at 7:57 AM, Dean Makuluni <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">> wrote:
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> > > > > > PLEASE REMIT YOUR AAM DUES Visit: (http://www.africanassociation.org/) (http://www.africanassociation.org/)www.AfricanAssociation.org (http://www.AfricanAssociation.org" target="1"> !!!
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> > > > > > Dear Vera & Victor:
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> > > > > > Let me start with Vera’s question. I will hopefully say something about your question in the course of this response to you Victor.
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> > > > > > Your question Vera is interesting , perhaps not only for Malawi. Still, I restrict myself to Malawi. Apart from the comments by the Gender Minister, I have not myself seen any other comments by women from Malawi on this matter. Some of the Minister’s concerns – such as that the bill is to protect women from abuse, including abandonment – seem laudable. Others, such as the claim that polygamy increases the chances of the spread of HIV-AIDS run contrary to actual scientific research.
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> > > > > > If I said as a joke to Aggo, let me say bluntly that I don’t agree with the minister. Matters of the efficacy of polygamy as cultural practice, as religious practice, or whatever, may be too complex to deal with in such cavalier fashion. The real problem here is that government is trying to enter where it shouldn’t contemplate going: the bedroom. Not too long ago, this same government put too gay men in jail, merely for announcing and celebrating their engagement in public, and even threatened to put them through medical tests to prove that they had engaged in sodomy. Those men are still in jail, apparently for their own protection, and have not been tried. Mrs Kaliati was the government spokesperson on that matter, condemning the gay men as having been set up to test the Malawi government’s resolve.
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> > > > > > This time around, the Minister talks about a family relations bill and says in the case of pending divorce, no sex between the couple will be allowed. All this is contrary to the bill of rights enshrined in the Constitution of the Republic of Malawi (Chapter IV). If Mrs Kaliati and the Malawi president actually paid attention to the Malawi constitution, if they actually understood that the constitution is worth more than the paper on which it is written, they would not even say the things they are quoted as saying in the media. To me, that is really what is worrying about the government’s recent attempts to legislate how consenting adults deal with each other in private.
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> > > > > > And this is where I begin to wonder, Victor: When such a powerful woman as Mrs Kaliati undresses in front of Mr Kaliati, do you really think it matters to her whether he is ready or not?
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> > > > > > --- On Sat, 5/1/10, Vera Crowell <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">> wrote:
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> > > > > > > From: Vera Crowell <[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">>
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> > > > > > > Subject: Re: Anger in Malawi over polygamy ban
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> > > > > > > To: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1"> (javascript:main.compose()
> > > > > > > Date: Saturday, May 1, 2010, 7:46 PM
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> > > > > > > PLEASE REMIT YOUR AAM DUES Visit: (http://www.africanassociation.org/) (http://www.africanassociation.org/)www.AfricanAssociation.org (http://www.AfricanAssociation.org" target="1"> !!!
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> > > > > > > On May 1, 2010, at 6:57 PM, Dean Makuluni < ([log in to unmask])[log in to unmask]" target="_blank">http:[log in to unmask])[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">> wrote:
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> > > > > > > > PLEASE REMIT YOUR AAM DUES Visit: (http://www.africanassociation.org/) (http://www.africanassociation.org/)www.AfricanAssociation.org (http://www.AfricanAssociation.org" target="1"> !!!
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> > > > > > > > Aggo:
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> > > > > > > > The Gender Minister, Patricia Kaliati, believes that one woman can satisfy a man. I am not agreeing or disagreeing with her.So don't quote me. Or quote me at your own risk. Patricia Kaliati is very confident about herself. Here is what she says about her relationship with her husband:
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> > > > > > > > "If there is a man who is enjoying, that's Mr Kaliati. I do take shower with him each and every morning, each and every evening. And when I am in my bedroom, I don't even switch off the lights when I am undressing myself and I need to challenge him that I am so beautiful if he thinks am not beautiful.
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> > > > > > > > "These are things a woman is supposed to do. Sometimes, we underrate ourselves that we are not beautiful because we are shy [sic]," she said.
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> > > > > > > > for the rest of the story, follow this link:
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> > > > > > > > http://www.nyasatimes.com/national/sex-workers-are-working-class-in-banks-–kaliati.html
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> > > > > > > > --- On Fri, 4/30/10, Aggo Akyea < ([log in to unmask])[log in to unmask]" target="_blank">http:[log in to unmask])[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">> wrote:
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> > > > > > > > > From: Aggo Akyea < ([log in to unmask])[log in to unmask]" target="_blank">http:[log in to unmask])[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">>
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> > > > > > > > > Subject: Anger in Malawi over polygamy ban
> > > > > > > > > To: ([log in to unmask])[log in to unmask]" target="_blank">http:[log in to unmask])[log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1">
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> > > > > > > > > Date: Friday, April 30, 2010, 12:47 PM
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> > > > > > > > > PLEASE REMIT YOUR AAM DUES Visit: (http://www.africanassociation.org/) (http://www.africanassociation.org/)www.AfricanAssociation.org (http://www.AfricanAssociation.org" target="1"> !!!
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> > > > > > > > > Anger in Malawi over polygamy ban
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> > > > > > > > > Story from BBC NEWS:
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> > > > > > > > > Muslims in Malawi have been angered by government plans to ban polygamy.
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> > > > > > > > > A spokesman for the Muslim Association of Malawi told the BBC the proposed law would discriminate against the country's Muslim minority.
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> > > > > > > > > He said with about 6% more women than men in Malawi , if polygamy were banned, many women would be left without a husband and become prostitutes.
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> > > > > > > > > The gender minister said the ban was necessary to prevent women from being abused in polygamous relationships.
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> > > > > > > > > She said problems occurred because men could not give their full attention to more than one woman.
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> > > > > > > > > “ I have only one wife, my dear wife... but the moment they proceed with this, I will take a second wife ” Imran Shareef Muhammed Muslim Association of Malawi
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> > > > > > > > > "When a man has two, three, four wives, they are not co-operative - one will be the loved one," said Gender Minister Patricia Kaliati.
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> > > > > > > > > It had not been a hasty decision and there had been wide consultation about the matter, she said.
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> > > > > > > > > But Imran Shareef Muhammed - secretary general of the Muslim Association of Malawi - disputed this.
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> > > > > > > > > "The minister is lying - she didn't consult the Muslim community," he told the BBC's Network Africa programme.
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> > > > > > > > > "We are totally rejecting it. There are also other ethnic groups [who practise polygamy] and they also totally reject this," he said.
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> > > > > > > > > "If these people go ahead banning polygamous marriages it means many women will go into prostitution.
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> > > > > > > > > "Every woman has the right to be under the shelter of a man."
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> > > > > > > > > He said under Sharia law, polygamy was optional.
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> > > > > > > > > "I have only one wife, my dear wife... but the moment they proceed with this, I will take a second wife," he said.
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> > > > > > > > > Should the ban come into affect, those already in polygamous marriages would not be affected, but those who flout it could face imprisonment, the minister said.
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> > > > > > > > > Story from BBC NEWS:
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> > > > > > > > > Published: 2010/04/30 14:32:22 GMT
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> > > > Ann Marie
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> > > > *** Send email to the list: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1"> ***
> > > > *** Access AAM list archives: (http://listserv.icors.org/archives/AAM.html)http://listserv.icors.org/archives/AAM.html (http://listserv.icors.org/archives/AAM.html" target="1"> ***
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> > > *** Send email to the list: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask])" target="1"> ***
> > > *** Access AAM list archives: http://listserv.icors.org/archives/AAM.html (http://listserv.icors.org/archives/AAM.html" target="1"> ***
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> > Ann Marie
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> > #avg_ls_inline_popup { position:absolute; z-index:9999; padding: 0px 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px; width: 240px; overflow: hidden; word-wrap: break-word; color: black; font-size: 10px; text-align: left; line-height: 13px;}
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> *** Send email to the list: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]> ***
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--
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~ 49.5 million US abortions since 1973; ~ 18 million Black babies aborted since 1973; ~ 5.6 million abortions in Africa between 1995-2003; ~ 12 million Africans sold into slavery between 15th - 19th centuries; ~ 2 million Africans died during Middle Passage (number uncertain).
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