Mary,

My childhood was relatively normal; I was bullied by a few of the other kids
between about 4th grade and 9th grade.  My CP was minimal; I had a slight
limp and limited coordination in my right arm, although I did write right
handed.  I pitched and threw footballs, etc., left handed though.  My CP is
secondary to a condition called hydrocephalus Here's a link to th NINDS page
on hydro for those who are interested in finding out more about the
condition:

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/hydrocephalus/hydrocephalus.htm

When I was 16, I had surgery for the hydrocephalus that turned out badly; I
had a stroke that paralyzed my left side, which was a real pain in the a**
as the CP had primarily affected my legs.

After the stroke, though, the bullying pretty much stopped. My parents never
talked to me about the CP, as the hydrocephalus was a larger concern as it
occassionally became acute, and could be pretty dangerous.  As such I never
talked to anyone else about my CP, and didn't know anyone outside of my
family and close friends knew about my hydrocephalus until I was in the 5th
or 6th grade.  At that point I'd taken all I could from the bullies, so one
day when they were chasing me across the schoolyard, I managed to get behind
the garbage cans, and decked the leader as he came past.  At that point, we
all got sent to the principals office, where I got in trouble for punching
John, and John (and the others) got in trouble for bullying me.  I found out
at that point that the principal knew about my hydrocephalus, but he didn't
mention the CP.

A couple of the guys who were involved in the bullying  later went to work
in the disabilities field, and have becme pretty good friends now that we're
adults.

My parents were a little over-protective, in that they discouraged me from
playing contact sports, and were very slow in teaching me to ride a bike.
My brother decided that it was time for me to learn whe I was 9, and kept at
it until I got it.  He also taught me to drive again after my stroke.

Academically I did very well, being on Honor Rolls and/or in AP classes from
3rd grade on.  I was even elected student body president my senior year in
high school.

I'm sorry that you were victimized to the extent you were, and would agree
that counseling can be very helpful.  I've gone to counsellors at a couple
points in my life, and it has been helped a lot.

On Tue, Apr 22, 2008 at 7:16 PM, Mary Powers <[log in to unmask]> wrote:

> Hello,
>
> I hope this is on topic, if not please let me know.
>
> I find it hard to describe to people what my childhood was like.? how my
> parents were afraid for me, b/c I was premature, and also how they really
> couldn't deal with the impairments I had.
>
> it was very stressful for me, but in a way that is difficult for me to
> explain.? the fear, the restrictiveness, and also the limitations, but then
> my having to try to prove myself as 'normal' or at least fake it.
>
> I have mild CP but I also have vision and vestibular issues, and something
> like epilepsy.? some brain problem that caused something like mild
> seizures.? I don't understand it so I can't explain it very well.
>
> one thing I heard is that children with disabilities, often parents set
> their expectations either too high or too low.? mine set them too high.? I
> had to achieve in school and fake normal and not quit or -
>
> walking was very hard but they had trouble if I walked "funny."
>
> they meant well, my parents, this is not to blame them, but I have a hard
> time describing what it was like.? b/c my parents had a lot of fear as well.
>
> it was a combination of
>
> 'do for yourself.? we can't help you'
>
> and
>
> 'the world is a dangerous place.'
>
> it was very confusing.
>
> does this sound familiar to anyone?
>
>
> thanks
>
>
> Mary Katherine
>
> ?
>
>
>
>
>
>
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>


-- 


Kendall

An unreasonable man (but my wife says that's redundant!)

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one
persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress
depends on the unreasonable man.

-George Bernard Shaw 1856-1950

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