Fatou ,
I agree with you . In my five daily prayer i always pray for Allah to give me fish money and school fees among others . I have seen a number of people die because of the lack of these two important items.Children do not understand if father has D5 for bread or not , they always think that father has every thing to meet there needs. It is also time that we start talking to our children and families about how much we earn ,how much indebted we are so that they understand what we can do and what we cant do. Thanks for sharing your experience with us. 

--- On Wed, 7/2/08, Ms Dibba <[log in to unmask]> wrote:

> From: Ms Dibba <[log in to unmask]>
> Subject: The Unspoken Depression of Gambians
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Date: Wednesday, July 2, 2008, 3:23 AM
> Okay, so this is a topic, that as Gambians, we do not really
> talk about.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> Depression..
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
>  Sometimes I think Our
> culture does not really recognize the signs of depression,
> meanwhile, many
> Gambians suffer from the symptoms, but are cautious to
> express their feelings
> and pains, or seek help.. because we worry about our dirty
> laundry being
> displayed out there For everyone to see.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> The truth is, this fear is justified, as a few Gambians
> know
> how to be confidential about other people’s private
> lives.. Even the ones who
> offer to help, end up, telling either their wives husbands
> etc or best friends
> who in turn go around telling others.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> And then, not only does one have to worry about the
> problems
> you are having, but then you also have to worry about the
> rumors and gossip
> that are spreading about you. Which personally, I believe
> you should not worry
> yourself too much about.. People will always talk about
> you.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> But the truth is, depression is not something to be ashamed
> of, The best of us go through it.. Presidents, doctors,
> lawyers, religious
> people, our parents etc..
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> The problem, is not getting help, which i know is a big
> step, and we are all afraid to do.
> 
> 
> 
> There have been many cases of people breaking down, and
> then
> being called crazy.. Recently a Gambian girl , after going
> through so much
> trauma, broke down, and was arrested and taken to a mental
> institution.. She is
> not crazy, she just recently went through a painful and
> traumatic experience
> and this is soon after having a baby. Her case is not the
> only case… there are
> so many more. What are we doing in our communities, in
> Gambia As well as abroad
> to educate and help our brothers and sisters? Especially
> abroad where
> depression is most likely to occur
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> I know exactly what is going on in her head, as I
> Personally
> after being Mentally and physically abused for years, and
> after going through a
> traumatic experience a week after my daughter was born,
> almost had a breakdown
> and those events have affected my life ever since. But
> Instead of having a
> mental break down, i put up a shield as a defense mechanism
> for this not to
> happen to me again. I act like everything is okay, but the
> truth is, those
> events are still as painful as the day they happened.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> The Fact is, whether you break down or not, there will be
> events in your life that happen to you as a result of
> something that happened
> to you in the past. Sooner or later, you break down.
> Sometimes, you are sad,
> and don't even know why.
> 
> 
> 
> Who do you turn to when this happens? Your Family, your
> friends,
> your religious leaders and very importantly your Doctor.
> Depression occurs due
> to a chemical imbalance within your brain. It needs to be
> treated, not matter
> how mild your symptoms are.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> The Best thing is to learn how to live for today, not dwell
> on the past, and think about all the good things you want
> for yourself in the
> future.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> But Not everyone is able to go back to normal after a
> painful event in their life, Death, loss of property,
> financial issues, living
> far away from your family Divorce, Physical and mental
> abuse. These are things
> that happen to everyone including Gambians. We all need
> help.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> Ultimately, the more faith, you have in God, the most
> likely
> you will learn to find peace. But reality is we need more
> support. And we need
> to identify the signs of depression we are having.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> I have said this often, our religious leaders need to be
> more proactive in helping out people. Death is painful, but
> there are so many
> things that are affecting people that are ignored.. How
> about reaching out to a
> man or woman, who has gone through a painful divorce? or
> financial
> difficulties, or lost their job etc. Go to them, if they do
> not come to you.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> We need to reach out to our religious leaders as well and
> make use of them. Contact them, when you have painful
> feelings and thoughts
> etc.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> Also please tell your doctor about your feelings, he will
> then recommend a therapist who can help you. And remember,
> just because you
> take depression pills, does not mean you are a certified
> nut case. it means you
> need temporary help getting through something.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> Make good use of your friends, the good ones, who will keep
> your problems private. There is nothing worse than having a
> friend who exposes
> your problems to others.. That can cause you more
> depression.
> 
> 
> 
> And I say often, if someone has problems, attempt to help
> them, but if you don't plan to help them, leave them
> alone and let them get the
> help they need, do not talk about them and hurt them even
> more by starting
> gossip. Be fearful of the effect you have in
> someone’s life and the
> consequences of your tongue flapping all over the place.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> I am not an expert, but i do speak from experience, below I
> listed, some of the signs of depression, the signs of
> depression can vary from
> person to person.
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> Feeling sad and down all the time
> 
> 
> 
> No longer interested in activities you used to like
> 
> 
> 
> Crying about every thing
> 
> 
> 
> Hopelessness
> 
> 
> 
> Not sleeping at night
> 
> 
> 
> Trouble focusing on things
> 
> 
> 
> Losing weight
> 
> 
> 
> Putting on weight (this is probably why many Gambian are a
> bit overweight)
> 
> 
> 
> Irritability
> 
> 
> 
> Restlessness
> 
> 
> 
> Fatigue
> 
> 
> 
> Getting annoyed at every little thing
> 
> 
> 
> Sexual problems, lack of interest,
> 
> 
> 
> Unexplained illnesses, always sick, physical body aches,
> headaches et
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> You are probably depressed if you any of these signs,
> 
> 
> 
> Let us not let our culture prevent us from seeking the help
> we need
> 
> 
> 
>  
> 
> 
> 
> Your thoughts please
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Thanks Fatou 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤
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