Headline News - 2
By Baba Galleh Jallow
More Felicitations for Ndareh
The great and Indomitable Ever Correct, Never Wrong Leader, His Foxylency
the Pious Poxident, Dr. Hajj Rabbi Bishop Imam Guru Hahatai Huhuhu Ndareh,
continues to receive messages of felicitation at Sad House, even though
there is nothing to felicitate him about. The latest felicitations are in
connection with his amazing recent truthbreaking breakthrough in raising the
dead.
The first massage to arrive for His Foxylency’s over-inflated ego comes from
our own patarobotic ambassador in the Republic of Say Yes Receive Help. The
message from His Excellent Ambassador Mr. Do Nought See Zero Jumper writes:
“Your Poxidency, it is with a deep sense of pratt that we peculate your
successful raising of the stiffs in our country and we are even more than
convinced without an iota of shame that you will give all stiffs in our
country a clean bill of wealth!
“Sir, your burning desire to better your lot at the expense of all of us is
hereby acknowledged and accepted as inevitable. We note and appreciate your
very biting love of wealth and power and we are proud that you can stand
before the whole entire big wide world and claim to do what no living person
has ever done throughout the history of ordinary mortal kind. We your
representatives in the big wide world are proud to stand before everybody
and sing your praises and defend your claims whether they make sense or not,
whether they are true or not, and whether they call us fools or not. We know
not shame. Only what you want. So, stay poked.
“Please permit me, Your Poxidency Sah, to confrapalate you on your
extraordinary feat in the field of medical, while rejoicing with you and
your glorious ever right, ever great and ever green national party group in
the resounding hiding you gave your opponents in the last poxidental and
parleyantry selections. I have no doubt that under your sagacious dealership
and polifontery, our great republic will stay where it is or even go back in
time as you continue to show the world and us your own style of untainted
fibocracy which is neither shy nor ashamed in broad daylight and night
light.”
For their part, the National Union of Brainwashed and Mediocre Schoolars of
the Center and Periphery for Non-Religious Politics have also sent in a
brilliant felicitation for His Foxylency the Poxident, Dr. Hajj Rabbi Bishop
Imam Guru Hahatai Huhuhu Ndareh. Their felicitation said:
“Your Foxylency Sah, the above named union wishes you and the entire
citizens of this great republic a happy Dependent Day. We the National Union
of Brainwashed and Mediocre Schoolars of the Center for Non-Religious
Politics celebrate your come backing to the sweet office of Poxident of the
republic and we have no doubt that in the interest of peace and national
security, you will further sharpen your sweet tooth for power and send all
so-called opponents under the ground until they can learn your worship your
Foxship. We all wish you the greatest success in your plan of staying in
power for one thousand years and even more, and we give you assurances of
our highest fideration and bless.”
Meanwhile, in his message of policitation, Dr. Susuhal Mopet Shoo Shoo
Gancha, Secretary General of the Divisional Committee of the Pious Elders of
Cosmetic Region, said:
“Your Poxidency, your recent thrashing and hiding of the so-called
opposition in the forthcoming national selections confirms once again the
loud, earsplitting barking that the confused electorate will make for your
outstanding inspirational and charismatic food and money donations coupled
with your carrot and stick policies which have brought tremendous fear and
trepidation to all citizens of this great republic which, we are happy to
note, you grip so tightly between your sharp teeth and claws. It signifies
great confidence in Your Foxylency’s desire and capability never to deliver
the urgent needs of the people, hence another mandate. We say Acha! Dahako!
“By giving you yet another forced mandate to ride over our grateful and
willing backs forever, I am sure we can all count on you to silence all
unpleasant noises in this great republic and give us our usual whipping when
we come to pay our respects during religious festivals. Rest assured, Your
Poxidency, that the moral whipping you give us is well deserved and in line
with the teachings of our books as we represent, interpret and understand
them. Our backs are ready and bare for your whip sah, so long as we get
those fat generous envelops at the end of each severe whipping. We know we
can count on more and more development projects only on paper, a
manifestation of Your Foxylency's noncommitment to the development of our
hungry accounts. Please accept Your Foxylency, the assurances of our highest
bootlickeration and hot steam. We love you sah, amin.”
More felicitations are expected to fly into Sad House where the Indomitable
Leader, His Mighty Foxylency the Poxident Dr. Hajj Rabbi Bishop Imam Guru
Hahatai Huhuhu Ndareh is still in hiding from the western media because they
like to ask funny questions about things they do not understand.
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