Fellow Africans,
I am reminded of a hadith of the Prophet(PBUH) to the effect that half of
our Religion comes from our wives! We are two sides of the same coin, and
must therfore learn to love, respect, and cherish each other. May Allah
bless U all!
Akere D. Achu, MCSE
>From: Jabou Joh <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Gambia and related-issues mailing list
><[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: Intergenerational Dialogue between two women
>Date: Fri, 19 Nov 1999 10:00:08 EST
>
>In a message dated 11/18/99 6:44:46 PM Central Standard Time,
>[log in to unmask] writes:
>
><< Jabou, we empathize with the women whose husbands treat them like second
> class citizens. However, we feel that western education is not the only
>way
> of the Gambian woman gaining her independence. There are women
>entrepreneurs
> back home who work in tailoring, fabric merchandising, etc., and we do
>not
> think they would be treated like that. Let's help our sisters back home
>with
> the resources for self-enhancement, thus raising their self-esteems
>levels
> high enough to take a detour from maltreatment like you described.
> >>
>*********************************************
>Awa & Ndey,
>
>Again thanks for this timely posting. However, l feel l must say here that
>l
>do not think l mentioned anything in my comment that implied that western
>education was the only way for Gambian women to gain their independence,
>and
>your comment here tends to imply that l said as much. l just mentioned the
>problem of the lack of respect for some of our sisters, demonstrated by
>their
>husbands, in that they do not discuss anything of significance with them at
>all, or even sit down to share a meal with them. Instead, they are
>relegated
>to order takers. l mentioned that they do not even sit down to eat with the
>wife, again giving the implication that they do not consider this
>individual
>an equal both in the partnership, as well as in intelligence. All these
>things have absolutely nothing to do with western education being needed to
>emancipate our sisters.
> Yes, there are many of our sisters who are engaged in entrepreneurial
>ventures that certainly give them the financial freedom, so that they do
>not
>have to feel the financial dependency that forces many a woman who are
>subjected to maltreatment by their spouses from speaking out. However, l
>think that to assume that the fact that these sisters are finacially able
>to
>support themselves has resulted in their total emancipation from male
>domination is quite a simplistic conclusion. While attaining financial
>independence is certainly a good point to start from, there are still many
>battles for us as women to fight.One can have all the money one needs so
>they
>do not have to be dependent, but perhaps the only other solution for this
>woman, when faced with an abusive, disrespectful or inconsiderate spouse
>would be to pack her bags and leave, which only serves as a temporary
>solution. l think what we must aspire to is a solution that will implement
>a
>change within that will ultimately take care of every aspect of how we are
>viewed in the society, as an integral part of it, able to contribute as
>much
>as anyone else. As you pointed out in your posting:
>
>"There cannot be any development without the full participation of women"
>
>The recognition that women are an integral part of the development of any
>nation has to start with our men gaining an understanding that we have
>opinions, ideas and the intelligence to contribute much. This in turn will
>only come about when we begin to see each other as equals, by interacting
>as
>equals, talking to each other, and where better to start than having a one
>on one interactions like sharing a meal. This was the basis of my comment
>about "not even sitting down to a meal with one's spouse".
>
>Now, then, the question is, how do we begin to help each other as women to
>gain not only the financial independence, but to face the overall
>challenge
>of being treated as just normal human beings with abilities to make
>staggering contributions?
>l am open to any ideas.
>
>Jabou Joh
>
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