yes they are. 

--- "Kendall D. Corbett" <[log in to unmask]>
wrote:

> These are great!
> 
> 
>   *Subject:* FW: DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT
> 
>  DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!
> 
> Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a
> repairman. Since she had to
> go to work the next day, she told the repairman,
> "I'll leave the key under
> the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the
> counter, and I'll mail
> you a check."
> 
> "Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog Spike.
> He won't bother you.
> But,
> whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances,
> talk to my parrot!" "I
> REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"
> 
> When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the
> following day, he
> discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he
> has ever seen. But, just
> as she had said, the dog just lay there on the
> carpet watching the repairman
> 
> go about his work.
> 
> The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time
> with his incessant
> yelling, cursing and name calling. Finally the
> repairman couldn't contain
> himself any longer and yelled,
> 
> "Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"
> 
> To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"
> 
> 
> MEN JUST DON'T LISTEN!!
> 
> 
> 
>  *A Parrott Named Moses*
> 
> A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined
> his flashlight around,
> looking for valuables, and when he picked up a CD
> player to place in his
> sack, a
> strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark
> saying, "Jesus is watching
> you."
> 
> He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his
> flashlight off, and froze.
> 
> When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his
> head, promised himself
> a
> vacation after the next big score, then clicked the
> light on and began
> searching
> for more valuables.
> 
> Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could
> disconnect the wires, clear as
> a
> bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you."
> 
> Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically,
> looking for the source
> of
> the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his
> flashlight beam came to
> rest
> on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the
> parrot.
> 
> "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm
> just trying to warn you."
> 
> The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world
> are you?"
> 
> "Moses," replied the bird.
> 
> "Moses?" the burglar laughed.. "What kind of people
> would name a bird
> Moses?"
> 
> "The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler
> Jesus."
> 
> Kendall
> 
> An unreasonable man (but my wife says that's
> redundant!)
> 
> The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the
> unreasonable one
> persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
> Therefore, all progress
> depends on the unreasonable man.
> 
> -George Bernard Shaw 1856-1950
> 
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