Ok, this one's on the edge, but cute nevertheless:
It's the first night of their honeymoon and the bride and groom are
sitting on the edge of the bed nervously deciding who's going to disrobe
first (ok, I know this is pretty staid for these times, but work with
me). Hubby loses the coin toss and as he takes off his shoes and socks
his bride notices that his toes are all gnarled and bent.
Asks the bride, "John, what on earth happened to your toes?"
John replies, "Well, sweetie, when I was just a wee lad I contracted
toe-lio."
"Don't you mean polio?" she queries in disbelief. "No, no, it was
toe-lio."
Uncertainly, she motions for him to continue, so John drops his pants
but leaves his boxers in place. Wifey is shocked to see that his knees
are covered with large, round scars. With much trepidation, she asks,
"Good lord, John, whatever happened to your knees?"
Replies John, "Well, honey, I eventually recovered from toe-lio, but it
left my immune system so weak that I came down with a horrible case of
kneezles."
"Don't you mean measles?" she asks, suspiciously.
"No, it really was kneezles--pretty bad case, too." answers John.
Well, at this point her guard is really up, so when he drops his
drawers, she blurts, "Don't tell me--smallcox, right?"
-----Original Message-----
From: Cerebral Palsy List [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf
Of Kendall D. Corbett
Sent: Monday, October 22, 2007 4:19 PM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: a little humor
OK, today's Shaggy Dog story:
A frog goes into a bank and hops over to the loan officer's desk. He
jumps
up onto the chair and says to the officer, "Hi, what is your name?" The
officer says, "My name is Patty Black. What can I do for you?" The frog
replies, "I want a loan." "OK," says Ms.Black, "let's fill out a loan
application. What is your name?" "Kermit," the frog says, "Kermit
Jagger."
"Oh, any relation to Mick Jagger?" Black asks. "Yeah, he's my Dad!"
answers
the frog. "Wow," says Patty Black. "Do you have any collateral?" "Yes,
I
do," and the frog reaches into his pocket and pulls out a big, bright
pink,
ceramic elephant. He places it on the desk in front of Patty Black.
She scratches hers head and says, "Excuse me for a moment." She then
walks
into the bank manager's office with the loan application and the
elephant in
hand. She says, "Uh, sir, there is this frog out there who wants a
loan." She hands the manager the application. "He brought this,
this...uh,
well, I don't quite know what it is, for collateral!" She puts the shiny
pink elephant on the manager's desk. "What should I do?" The bank
manager
stands up and shouts, "It's a knick-knack, Patty Black, give the frog a
loan!! His old man's a Rolling Stone!!!!!!"
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