Ken,
That last one was absolutely the BEST!!! Gave me a good laugh as I
needed a break from working on my comprehensive exams. Let's just
say taking three classes, preparing a dissertation proposal,
completing comps, and raising a 17 month-old makes me need the humor
to just stay SANE!!
Linda
On Oct 28, 2007, at 9:53 PM, ken barber wrote:
> **************************************************
>
> A woman came home, screeching her car into the
> driveway, and ran into the
> house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top
> of her lungs, "Honey,
> pack your bags. I won the lottery!"
>
> The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack,
> beach stuff or mountain
> stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out"
>
> **************************************************
>
> Marriage is a relationship in which one person is
> always right, and the other is a husband.
>
> **************************************************
>
> A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a
> driver's license.
> First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
> The optician showed him a card with the letters:
> 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
>
> "Can you read this?" the optician asked.
>
> "Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
>
>
> **************************************************
> Mother Superior called
> all the nuns together and said to them,
>
> "I must tell you all something. We have a case of
> gonorrhea in the convent."
>
> "Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm
> so tired of chardonnay."
>
> no offence for any Catholics on the list.
>
> **************************************************
> A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her
> husband.
>
> Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.
>
> "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more
> butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once.
> TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need
> more butter. O h my GOD! WHERE are we going to get
> MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful .
> CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me
> when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are
> you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to
> salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
> Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
>
> The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong
> with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple
> of eggs?"
>
> The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show
> you what it feels like when I'm driving."
>
>
>
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