you make me blush, Miss Angel. *smile* It's only the Lord working in
me and on me but I thank you for your kind words. They are an
encouragement and I do have a tendency to see myself too negatively.
One of the friends I asked for bluntness and one who speaks to my
middle sometimes responded to some of the stuff I produced by telling
me, "That's your warped thinking." <g> And there is something to that.
But believe me, if you'd know me close up beyond the lists we're on,
you'd also see some of the less shiny spots. <g> Mr.God needs to do a
lot of polishing still and I know he will always find some more to
shine. <g> But that's what Jesus specializes in.
I'm honored to have your friendship, too, miss Angel. I was delighted
to find out that the angel I knew from e-church was the same i had
met in other forums. :-)
I'm just one of Mr God's motley crew and happy to attempt to do my
part under his direction and wings. <g>
Love and hugs,
Doris
At 12:37 PM 5/30/2007 -0400, you wrote:
>Well, as you invited bluntness, I shall be the first to be extremely
>blunt and direct. I have known you Doris from other lists. I will
>say exactly what I think. I have always liked you. I find you to
>be an extremely loving and to be a caring person who will often
>takes time to look beyond the superficial to see the individual
>beneath the surface which is not often seen by others. I know this
>personally. I think you are a very rare individual, and wish there
>were more like you. If there were this world would be a far better
>one in which to live. I am glad to be counted a friend.
>----- Original Message ----- From: "Chipmunks" <[log in to unmask]>
>To: <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Wednesday, May 30, 2007 9:37 AM
>Subject: Re: Questions To Ponder
>
>
>>I'm not sure I follow these questions. I am somewhat afraid of
>>people seeing me close up and not liking what they see. I do not
>>open up and trust easily. but once people do get to know me, they
>>get to know me. I am me and Oon't really know how to be someone
>>else and don't really want to learn that either.
>>
>>this may in part be a cultural thing. Germans on the whole are
>>pretty direct if not to say blunt sometimes and some of my American
>>friends who have lived in this country sometimes consider Germans pretty rude.
>>
>>
>>Some people when they get to know me and see the all of me will
>>pull away. That can be painfuland I know the pain of rejection and
>>fear it but I rather have fewer genuine relationships than many shallow ones.
>>
>>when I get closer to someone, make friends, i try to ask for
>>directness, bluntness. I especially find this important in an
>>intercultural setting where the obvious to one party might not at
>>all be the aame to the other. So I might as well take the
>>opportunity to extend this request to you guys on this list that
>>you give me "blunt" if there is a need for it. <g> I find that the
>>relationships where there is directness work the best for me.
>>
>>When I get close to someone, I do fear the other seeing too much,
>>fear the pain of rejection and that sometimes causes a lot of inner
>>turmoil to me as I lack self-confidence a lot and am used to
>>secondguessing myself a lot. this is where my lessons in "simple!"
>>come in. And I sometimes find that "simple!" is the hardest for me to learn.
>>
>>While I struggle with the fear to be seen too much of a lot, at the
>>same time, I long for "come and see" in my close relationships and
>>try to keep my shields down. I used to be very different, used to
>>be walled in a whole lot more and sometimes I wonder if that is not
>>the better choice. Probably it's a matter of balance and I'm not
>>always very good at finding that balance.
>>
>>I find that what i feel about and how I handle my human
>>relationships also affects my relationship with God. I am still
>>very much trying to learn to trust God completely and sometimes
>>feel scared of him or think he might not want to hear me or talk to
>>me. I marvel at the God of the Universe caring so much to not only
>>put up with me, but liking me, loving me, being excited about me.
>><g> Itr is incredible to me that Jesus loved me enough to die for
>>me so that i could live, would have the chance to be right with God
>>and relate to the Creator of the Universe on a very intimate level.
>>
>>Of course it is silly to try and hide from the god who created me,
>>knew me from the beginning of time and yet I find that I sometimes
>>want to do that. It's been Mr God's work over the recent months to
>>try and teach me differently, teach me "simple!" and affirm the
>>"come and see" of which there is no way out with him anyway. I sure
>>am grateful for that. Getting to know Mr.God close up is the
>>bestest thing ever! And i am so thankful for him caring about me,
>>accepting me, loving me,providing for me and also for the family in
>>Christ he has given me.
>>
>>And I can't help but be me. If anything, since getting to know God
>>more up close, I've been more "me" than ever before. It amakes me
>>more aware of my shortcomings and faults and finity and I am more
>>than ever aware that I have no chance without God's grace and mercy
>>and without Jesus but that is just the wonder of that. And i am
>>learning that this applies to people too. I'm learning about love,
>>the unconditional kind that I had a bit of a shortage of
>>sometimes - both with Mr.God and with people.
>>
>>the potential Mr God sees in me often feels many sizes too big but
>>yet he seems to think I'll fit that eventualy and that gives me
>>hope and as I grow in the lord, i hope that I'll be more like him
>>and hope I'll shine that back on people. I so much long to be of
>>service and have people see Mr.God in me just as I have seen and
>>see mr.god in the people Mr.God puts in my life.And with Mr.God,
>>it's got to be genuine and straight because he's in the middle and
>>knows and I can only reflect God when I reflect from my middle out
>>and don't put on filters.
>>
>>I think I rambled enough and I hope this is not too crude or
>>personal but the question kind of touched me. I do hope that I am
>>genuine enough to let Mr.God shine out from me unfiltered and unshielded.
>>
>>God Bless,
>>
>>Doris
>>
>>
>>At 06:40 AM 5/30/2007 -0600, you wrote:
>>
>>>Who would you be if you were yourself? What if people saw you for whom you
>>>really are? Who would you be then?
>>>
>>>Phil.
>>>
>>>
>>>
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>>>5/28/2007 11:40 AM
>>
>>
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>
>
>
>--
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